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Life goes on getting worse

No Twinkies, no problem. Can’t abide a Sno-Ball. I can take or leave your Ding Dongs and Ho Hos. Donettes — nice, but expendable. Without Wonder Bread, you’ll just have to insult middle Americans via some other pale, bland, popular food product.

But, ohhhh. Oh, no. Please. By all that is wholesome and sweet and good, not Suzy Qs!!

So moist. So creamy. So delightfully artificial. I haven’t eaten a Suzy Q in thirty years, but how vividly I recall those slabs of devil’s food and creme melting to the shape of my tongue. It was the surpassing stoner gustatory experience.

Oh, Suzy Q! <sobs, wads fists>

November 16, 2012 — 10:36 pm
Comments: 58