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Maintenant, réchapper à MacDo!

Who is the world’s second-biggest consumer of tasty MacDonald’s fast food? The French. I shitteth thee not.

In a move that makes The Narrative cower in the corner, whimpering, a mob of angry Frogs from the town of Saint-Pol-sur-Ternoise has marched to demand somebody finish building our goddamned MacDonald’s toot sweet.

The courts put a halt to construction (seen above) because the site was zoned for industrial or artisanal activities, and a MacDonald’s is a commercial one. The suit was brought to court by a company that runs a dump nearby. I mean an actual dump, a “refuse site.” Mon dieu!

The townspeople are eyeing the 30 or so jobs the restaurant would bring and also, of course, those crazy tasty Big Macs and fries.

Anyhoo, their FaceBook page is oui oui au macdo st pol. MacDo. I really like that. Much better than Mickey D’s. I hated it when some marketing droid foist that off on us, and I hated it even more when I heard myself using it.

From now on, MacDo for me, in solidarity with my French brothers and sisters. Won’t you join me?

Good weekend, all!


Comment from QuasiModo
Time: May 30, 2014, 11:29 pm

One of my friends got sick on it once and called it ‘Rotten Ronnies’ after that…it stuck but got shortened to ‘Rotten’s’.

I never liked people who called it Mickey D’s.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: May 30, 2014, 11:37 pm

I got sick on it once, too. Must’ve been…early Seventies. Just got a bad Big Mac and tried to hold it as long as I could (that’s when I learned the important life lesson, don’t try to hold a bad Big Mac).

On the other hand, I had a Big Mac, fries and a Coke every day of 1975. If I recall correctly, it was under a buck. Oh, and I was skinny.

Comment from mojo
Time: May 30, 2014, 11:45 pm

“Royale with from age, sil vouz play…”

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: May 31, 2014, 1:16 am

Mac’s has been the most common nickname in my hearing. The nickname that I use myself, though, I learned from a Japanese friend: makudonarudo. Priceless!

During the Vietnam war (I am an American), I was a student for a while and had a draft deferment as such. I lost the deferment and was immediately placed at the top of the 1A list, and this was before the lottery so it was a pretty sure thing that I’d be pressed into “service” in the Army. I needed to eat, and so needed a job, but no one was interested in having anything to do with the likes of soon-to-be-conscripted me.

Except Ray Kroc and company. Say what you like about Mac’s and its fast food supremacy, I will always be grateful to them for hiring me, and treating me fairly – including increased responsibilities and pay raises – knowing my inherently temporary status.

One last gratuitous item: this was late 1968, early ’69. For the few months I worked at Mac’s I saw the switch from fresh potatoes to frozen (the fresh were better but way-way-way more human work was involved), the introduction of the Big Mac, hot apple and cherry pies, and steamed buns for the fish filet sandwich. It was a thrilling time! (-:

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: May 31, 2014, 1:17 am

I’ve never gotten sick on it, thankfully…still remember the first time we went to McDonalds’s…back in the 70’s as well…loved it.

Comment from Mrs Comton
Time: May 31, 2014, 3:45 am

1964 was my first visit to MacDo. A boy I liked was working there so I made my mom drive me so I could see him.

Comment from Tom
Time: May 31, 2014, 8:31 am

Are there any burning sheep carcasses in the roads yet? That’s how you know the Frenchies are serious.

I worked at Makudonarudo’s (that’s just become my new name for it. Thanks Uncle Al!)for an entire weekend sometime in the late 70s. Even though it was only two and a half days “If you can lean, you can clean” is still stuck in my head. On the list of things that I’ll be eternally shamed by (nothing criminal), not sticking it out at Makudonarudo’s is in the top 10.

I also got a bad Filet O’Fish once at the store on the Kilburn High Road. It was the day of one of Tone’s general election victories and the bloody Labour people kept knocking on the damn door all day long as I was laying on the cool tiles of our bathroom thanking God for indoor plumbing and the foresight to have a cleaner so those tiles weren’t filthy.

Comment from Deborah
Time: May 31, 2014, 1:17 pm

A lot of the state-side McDonalds employees are on strike for higher wages. If the one in Saint-Pol-sur-Ternoise were only finished, those employees could go on strike too!

I was 20 before I ate my first McDonald’s burger, and I was in my 50s before I ate a Big Mac—which I liked a lot more than I thought I would. We live in a rural lake resort town, and our only fast food joints are McDonalds and Subway. We do have a Dairy Queen, which I prefer, but we try to rotate them all since we can’t risk getting burned out on any one of them.

On the up side, I’ve learned to make great pizza, but I’d kill for a donut shop. And I’m stealing Makudonarudo, too!

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: May 31, 2014, 3:51 pm

Oh dang. I haven’t even been inside of a McShits since 1996, & haven’t had their food since 1994. I still have nightmares about those terrible pancakes & sausage patties.

On the other hand, I will occasionally eat Arby’s, which to be honest is far far worse than Ronnie’s House of Clown Rape.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: May 31, 2014, 5:57 pm

Ronnie’s House of Clown Rape

Dang. And I was hoping not to have to make any difficult decisions this weekend.

I guess it is Cop-Out Time: I’ll alternate.

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: May 31, 2014, 9:51 pm

Well, I went ahead and had Makudonarudo’s for supper…all this talk was making me hungry :+)

I wish we had a Dairy Queen close by…I would kill for a Peanut Buster Parfait…

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: June 1, 2014, 2:51 am

I ate one bite of a McDonald’s burger once. Never again.

I do like McDonald’s breakfast, though.

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: June 1, 2014, 4:35 am

Clearly McDonalds isn’t paying their bribes here. Its well known that’s how you get things done in France as a business.

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: June 1, 2014, 5:41 am

First of all, I must say that this blog is one of the most enjoyable on the DubyaDubyaDubya. I find such entertaining bits of information here and such witty comments. It’s not like other blogs where flame wars break out in every other thread about some perceived slight or such thing as that.
And now, to the meat of my comment regarding this assertion: “Who is the world’s second-biggest consumer of tasty MacDonald’s fast food? The French.” I have just realized, for real, that Western European Civilization is over. When the preferred French nomenclature for a fast food enterprise of American origin is “MacDo,” when storming the unfinished “Mickey D’s” is equivalent to storming the Bastille then Western Civ is done for.
On the other hand, what have The Surrender Monkey’s done for us lately? Forcing Gerard Depardieu to become a Russian citizen to avoid confiscatory tax rates was really no loss. His girth is approaching that of Marlon Brando during his glutton period. They could have invented “The Paté Drive Thru” but no – after more than two centuries of advancing culture, cooking, science, technology, literature, and various leadership roles in colonial enterprises, they give in to an unfinished “MacDo.” It’s hard to watch this kind of decline, really….

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: June 1, 2014, 7:36 am

“… after more than two centuries of advancing culture blah blah blah …”

I meant, of course, “two millennia of advancing culture blah blah blah …”

Comment from Nina
Time: June 1, 2014, 2:02 pm

Not a McDonalds food fan, although I admire them corporately. If they want to see a fuss made over American fast food, though, have them build an In-n-Out. Mmmmmmmm

We lived not far from the first McDo in Sacramento, back when the sign read “millions” and I had to remind my mother every time that I wanted mine plain. She was convinced that if she just “forgot” to order a plain one for me I’d start liking them that way and stop being such a pain with my gustatory quirks. That was mid sixties. It is now the mid teens and I still don’t like condiments on my burgers…or anything else either, such as sandwiches. In this days before Big Mac a burger had ketchup, mustard, and a pickle. Ugh.

That McDonalds is still there, although it’s been rebuilt at least twice. Last time I was there they had photos of the old place hanging on the walls, which as cool.

Comment from Harry
Time: June 1, 2014, 2:07 pm

Mrs. Peel–two sausage biscuits and a diet Pepsi are a great way to start any day (I don’t drink coffee–it does horrible things to my digestive tract).

Stark–I don’t know where you are, but here in Texas the Arby’s are GREAT eating–but then, down here, serving a meat sandwich that is sub par is a hanging offense.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: June 1, 2014, 9:55 pm

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: June 1, 2014, 7:36 am

I meant, of course, “two millennia of advancing culture blah blah blah …”

Hrm, they imported a bunch of Italian cooks & then called their Italian cooking “French Cuisine”, so there’s that. Oh, & they invaded England & fucked up our poor language so even we aren’t always sure what we’re saying anymore. They gave us a stupid measuring system that only uses tens, so you have to do screwy things to divide stuff into threes & fours. They held a violent, socialist revolution that served as the model for Russia & China, which led to all kinds of great stuff in the 20th century. I mean, even the Cat-Lickers owe them a debt of gratitude for the whole “Anti-pope” thing (& the bizarre kerfluffle(s) over ultramontanism).

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: June 2, 2014, 12:28 am


They had a promotion in the 70s, you got a iron-on design for a tee shirt and if you wore it and said that you got a free big mac. It was my first one, and I was disappointed. it wasn’t very big and it was crappy compared to mom’s burgers.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 2, 2014, 2:08 am


I seem to recall it was a bad promo for Makudonarudo because a lot of not bright people showed up and thought they’d get a free burger just for reciting the line. Nuh-uh!

Crying kids! Angry adults! Oh, the humanity!

Now, if they’d said, “The sixth Sikh sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” successfully that might have been at least newsworthy.

Comment from Oceania
Time: June 2, 2014, 7:58 am

Obama is in the terminal stages of AIDs.
His white blood cell count is plummeting …

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: June 2, 2014, 3:53 pm

Oops you’re right I left off the only flavor on the burger. Still, lousy flagship product. Worst burger they have.

The one burger that tasted the best was the one divided up with the cold on one side and hot on the other, I can’t even remember what it was called. But it was never squashed and always tasted better. Probably cost them a lot to put out though, it had a special container.

Comment from LesterIII
Time: June 2, 2014, 7:00 pm

The Lettuce and Tomato Special renamed to McDLT: “The hot stays hot, the cool stays cool” in its unique container. Agree, was their best product.

Comment from David Gillies
Time: June 2, 2014, 7:42 pm

The Sausage and Egg McMuffin is the Platonic ideal of breakfast food: it has salt, grease, protein and carbs in the perfect ratios.

I boycotted the place for several years while Joan Kroc was still alive. The day the disgusting socialist bitch died I treated myself to a double quarterpounder with extra bacon.

Fun fact: Costa Rica was the first country outside the US and Canada to get a McDonald’s. Now they’re everywhere (but we have most of the chains: BK, Taco Bell, Wendy’s, Subway, Quizno’s, KFC, Applebee’s, TGIF, Pizza Hut, Domino’s, Papa John’s, Chili’s, Carl’s Jr. and so forth. No Chipotle, Red Lobster or Krispy Kreme yet.)

Comment from Pupster
Time: June 2, 2014, 8:41 pm

It’s not like other blogs where flame wars break out in every other thread about some perceived slight or such thing as that.

The McDLT was stupid. Cheese needs to be hot and melty on the burger.

McDonald’s 1/4 Pounder with cheese (Royale) was a special treat for me growing up. It was also where I had my first job, and I lasted 3 four-hour shifts of mopping the floors, wiping the tables and chairs, and taking out the trash before they realized I wasn’t McDonald’s Material.

I got better.

Comment from LesterIII
Time: June 3, 2014, 12:33 am

I never considered that crap cheese, so I never requested it on my L&TS/McDLT.

Never worked there. Saw a classmate lose most of the flesh from his hand by having his auto-chivalry response kick in and try and retrieve another (female) classmates piece of dropped jewelry from the deep-fryer. I realized I wasn’t ever going to do time at The Arches.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 3, 2014, 12:36 am

@David Gillies – Unless I’m misinterpreting, you live in Costa Rica, yes? If so, I do hope you are watching the corruption scandal surrounding Ann Maxine Bender and her double jeopardy trial convicting her of killing her husband, this after the first trial acquitted her. The hundreds of millions of dollars in the trust might have something to do with her problems.

I have a personal interest in the situation.

Comment from David Gillies
Time: June 3, 2014, 1:01 am

Yes, believe me I know all about it.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 3, 2014, 1:12 am

@DG – Ann is my niece, and needs help.

Ask me about Juan de Dios Alvarez if you have asbestos ears.

Comment from Mitchell
Time: June 3, 2014, 2:50 am

I’m largely indifferent to McDo’s burgers. My first B-flipper job was at Wendy’s and I’m still loyal. I can tell from the drive-through window that they still have EVERYTHING set up the way they did in the late ’80s.

That said I do like McDo’s sausage egg mcmuffins and hashbrowns. They have a deal where you get two mcmuffins for $3.33 but the morning shift dingbat cashier ALWAYS tries to ring me up for full price.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: June 3, 2014, 7:51 am

Deborah @May 31, 2014, 1:17 pm:A lot of the state-side McDonalds employees are on strike for higher wages.

No. A handful of McDonalds employees and lots and lots of hired SEIU goons are staging “protests” demanding $15.00/hour.

It’s a pure astroturf movement. Probably intended to shake McD’s down for some kind of backdoor payoff.

Comment from musical mountaineer
Time: June 3, 2014, 5:58 pm

I have never called it Mickey D’s. I call it SmackDownalds. It’s one of my regular stops, along with Taco Belch and The Home Despot.

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: June 3, 2014, 10:46 pm

Correct, most of the protestors, in fact nearly all of them have never worked at the place in their lives. They’re paid to protest, and I doubt they even get minimum wage.

Comment from Lipstick
Time: June 10, 2014, 11:32 am


Followed by Have it your way, have it your way at BURGER KING.

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