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I have a hilarious problem


I have a problem with video games, my imaginary friends: my house is cooler than Skyrim. Check out this photo. Yeah, there’s a roaring fire just behind the monitor. No, I haven’t ‘shopped the bits together.

I’m playing Witcher at the moment, but the principle is the same. Sword ‘n’ sorcery games are stuck somewhere between Medieval and Tudor Europe (well, the costumes in the Witcher look more 17th C, but it’s all of a piece). Big oak beams, brick inglenooks, wattle-and-daub walls. Yup, that’s our place.

I exist in a bubble of what I think of as ‘England porn.’ I work for an historical society, so my days are filled with even older buildings and old documents. My nights in Badger House involve getting sozzled in front of a roaring fire watching history programs on TV. Weekends, we go to village fetes, bonfires and stately homes.

Oh, it’s lovely. Don’t get me wrong. But I often have the feeling something horrible is sneaking up on me while I indulge.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 2, 2015, 10:37 pm

“But I often have the feeling something horrible is sneaking up on me while I indulge.”

That will be Jack.

According to some genius in the Daily Mail this weekend, cats are neurotic and always plotting how to kill us.

Help. There are two psychotic killers asleep by the fire tonight. Dear diary, what should I do?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 2, 2015, 11:08 pm

I was thinking more along the lines of ‘Syrian’ ‘refugees’.

Comment from Nina
Time: November 2, 2015, 11:22 pm

I’ve got two psychotic killers sprawled on me right now, and so far I’ve survived unscathed.

So far.

Comment from bad cat robot
Time: November 3, 2015, 2:32 am

You play games like Skyrim and Witcher to train up. It isn’t easy being a villager with a torch and pitchfork forming up with the neighbors to storm the castle without a bit of preparation, you know. And it looks like you have enough ironmongery there to handle a boatload of “refugees” — or a hill or so of Sidhe.

Comment from unkawill
Time: November 3, 2015, 2:47 am

Too bad they disarmed all Y’all. But the FP implements should come in handy for the zombie Apocalypse.

Comment from feynmangroupie
Time: November 3, 2015, 4:30 am

The British Islamic version of “The Four Olds” is just around the corner.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 3, 2015, 8:30 am

Most of those fire implements were here when we bought the place. We don’t really know what they are. They’re kind of terrifying.

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: November 3, 2015, 1:32 pm

Either death or taxes. Either of those spring eternal and without warning.

Now, the taxes may take form as a swarthy man with dour contemplation and a large knife. Whatever. Or was that the death part? For all I know, they are one and the same…

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: November 3, 2015, 1:34 pm

I keep looking at those beams and shudder to myself and think “there be all sorts of nasty critters in that shite”.

And therein lies a reason why I have no desire to visit your neck of the woods.

Comment from technochitlin
Time: November 3, 2015, 2:33 pm

If you weren’t such a likable person I’d be seething with envy. Instead, I’m just a light shade of green…

Comment from technochitlin
Time: November 3, 2015, 2:43 pm

Oops, left this off. Seeing that shot of your monitor, might I suggest a little program called Fences? http://www.stardock.com/products/fences/

Comment from mojo
Time: November 3, 2015, 4:09 pm

I used Stardock’s Object Desktop years ago, it was nice but had problems, kept crashing windows and dropping you into DOS (yes, that long ago).

Surely they’ve improved it by now. The windowblinds function was especially nice.

Maybe I should give it another look.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 3, 2015, 5:14 pm

Hey, that looks pretty useful, ‘chitlin. I loved the multiple desktops in most Linux distros.

I think of the number of icons on my desktop as minimalist and restrained, though. You should see Uncle B’s!

Comment from technochitlin
Time: November 3, 2015, 6:45 pm

I’ve been using Fences in both home and business environments for years with no problems- it has become one of my must-have utilities. Keeps my scattered brain more organized, and I like that a doubleclick on the desktop makes every icon disappear. Makes my wallpaper purtier 🙂

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