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Today’s Fun British Fact

my brain has escaped

It is illegal to mail horror comics to the UK.

For reals. I tried to find an online citation for that, but I couldn’t. It’s true, though. The lady at the Post Office showed me the regulation sheet.

I wasn’t trying to do that. I was trying to mail Uncle B an air pistol. A BB gun. PO Lady wouldn’t let me, on account of it’s “a weapon.” And I say, “a reproduction weapon.” And she says, “well you could hurt somebody with it.” And I say, “I could hurt you with this Customs Declaration form if I tried hard enough.”

I lost. Of course I did. Nobody ever argues the regulations and wins.

My real guns are going in the shop (most of them, anyway). But I have a couple of CO2 pistols I’d like to keep. They’re perfectly legal in the UK, but one looks exactly like a Glock and the other looks like a Walther PPK. I figured I didn’t want to pack them in with my household stuff, on the off-chance they turn up on an x-ray or something and get everything confiscated. So I decided to mail them on ahead.

I’m sure the comic regulation is some fusty old thing left over from the pre-Code comics era. Like the comic I stole this header graphic from. Which is in my horror comic collection.

Which is packed with my stuff.

Oh, piffle.

sock it to me

Comments


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 2:47 pm

Stoatie, what kind of guns are you selling? I tend to collect military relics, and was kind of curious.

 


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 2:49 pm

I also have the complete Samurai Cat graphic novel series somewhere. I need to dig them out and read them again, they are a trip……. 🙂

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 30, 2008, 2:57 pm

Nothing interesting, SF. I bought several real cheap plinkers when I first started going to the firing range. The only two worth having I’m going to try to smuggle down to Nashville (not really smuggle…I mean bring down legally when I see my dad before I go).

Like, I have a Makarov in .40 S&W (it says Made in Russia in English on the grips, so it’s obvious who it was made for). And a top-break 7-shot .22 revolver that has a spring that looks like it belongs in a Bic pen.

I have a thing for cheap or ugly guns. They’re like stray cats 🙂

 


Comment from JuliaM
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:06 pm

“I was trying to mail Uncle B an air pistol. A BB gun. PO Lady wouldn’t let me, on account of it’s “a weapon.””

pfft! All he needs to do is get down to his nearest boot sale. There’ll be someone there who will sell him as many airguns or crossbows as his heart desires (at least, there always is in my part of Essex!).

There’s usually a ‘pharmacy’ stall that won’t scruple to sell you more than two packs of paracetomol either, in date too. They could care less if you plan to top yourself with them…

Probably a few comics sellers too.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:19 pm

Stoaty – OT, but those floaty alien thingys that (perhaps?) drop down over one’s head and do something indescribable – they seem familiar.

Like from a particularly bad 50’s sci-fi flick I saw once but cannot name. Are they from a real movie? Are you going to make me find it without a hint?

 


Comment from bad cat robot
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:41 pm

Scubafreak! You read Samurai Cat too? I know the author, virtue of going to college in Delaware and hanging out at the same gaming hovel he did. Note the maps always have Delaware and “the author’s house” marked? Even if the rest of the map is Cimmaria or Mars? I think my favorite is “The Kremlin Litter”.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:43 pm

It’s from a Basil Wolverton comic, McGoo. He was the artist. It’s been reissued in recent years, and I do have a copy somewhere in all my shit. I thought maybe someone would turn up and recognize it, but as I’m not running a contest, what the hell. Google “brain bats from Venus.”

Yeah, they drop over your head like adorable crocheted hats and take over your brain functions.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:48 pm

Ah, ha. I thought it might be from a movie marquee poster or sumpin. Thanks!

There really was a sci-fi flick that had things kinda like that. But I can only remember one li’l scene from it, and I can’t remember the title.

Basil Wolverton. Hence the BW initials in the lower right corner. *Note McGoo’s mind in steel-trap mode!*

 


Comment from apotheosis
Time: October 30, 2008, 4:51 pm

PO Lady wouldn’t let me, on account of it’s “a weapon.” And I say, “a reproduction weapon.” And she says, “well you could hurt somebody with it.”

John Candy? Nat’l Lampoon’s Vacation? Anyone?

 


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:04 pm

BCR – I always loved “Bethlehems Lot” (the Great Bl’sue having to sign a damage waiver with the Massachussets National Guard was funny as hell) and “Night of the living Red Dead”. Of course, the Picture of Shiro, in a zoot suit, holding a 30mm gatling gun 20 times his size with a look of sheer extasy on his little phsyco kitty face was easily one of the coolest pics Waters ever did….. 🙂

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:07 pm

I am now the #2 hit in Google Lithuania for “weasel blowing line.”

 


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:08 pm

God, I need to learn to spell someday…… LOL

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:44 pm

The funny thing is that we can buy as many CO2 guns as we like here. Indeed, we pioneered the (really quite deadly) air rifles that use gas from divers’ bottles. The problem is that those for UK use are limited to the pressure they can operate at, but they can still make excellent hunting weapons.

I suspect the problem is that the USA allows a higher pressure to be used, so to save the nice ladies and gentlemen at Customs and Excise (who, I’m sure will be reading this now – thank you, Stoaty) from having to check each one being posted to see what it is rated at, they’ve just banned the lot.

Our legislators are, of course, fools and knaves. But you knew that already, didn’t you?

 


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:55 pm

Badger – Didn’t they try to outlaw kitchen knives a couple years ago? On the theory that anything bigger than a paring knife was excessive and was only usefull as a mankiller?

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:57 pm

Badger – I could be wrong, but I am suspecting that a tiny smidgen – just the itty-bittiest pinch, mind you – of cynicism just barely managed to maybe creep into your comment.

I’d heard that Customs & Excise folks (and the legislators) were just so many bloated and swollen rectums. ‘Course, I hang out with a tough crowd.

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: October 30, 2008, 5:59 pm

I think that was a bit of an exaggeration, Scubafreak but there is an undoubted paranoia over here. Mind you, we really do have a very serious problem of kids carrying (and using) knives.

Of course, ban knives and the little bastards would start carrying lead pipes.

 


Comment from wendyworn
Time: October 30, 2008, 6:28 pm

or broken bottles, I hear that’s big for the bar fights in the UK

 


Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: October 30, 2008, 7:24 pm

Why not just let the adults carry pimp hands? That would solve the mouthy-kid problem quick, fast, and in a hurry. At least, it did when I was growing up.

*shuffles off with walker*

Hey! You kids get off my lawn!

 


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: October 30, 2008, 7:32 pm

Personally, I am a big believer in Bear mace and shotshells loaded with rocksalt targeted on the gluts……

 


Comment from nicole
Time: October 30, 2008, 7:45 pm

Pft. Anything you do to a kid these days can wind you up in court. Your kid or anyone else’s. No manners, trespassing, property damage, all fine. But you better not even think about laying a hand on little Timmy or damaging his self-esteem by calling him a snot-nosed punk. I can’t imagine how rocksalt from a shotgun would go over nowadays. 🙂

 


Comment from Blake
Time: October 30, 2008, 7:45 pm

The Brain Bats of Venus! (I’d link but I’m worried about ending up in the porn bucket. It’s not as much fun as it sounds.)

The cops rousted The Boy yesterday for carrying knives. Banning knives? You can get thrown in jail for carrying something that might be used like brass knuckles!

 


Comment from wendyworn
Time: October 30, 2008, 8:44 pm

you can get thrown in jail for having a brown lawn these days, sheesh.

 


Comment from Nortius Maximus
Time: October 30, 2008, 10:23 pm

You can get thrown in jail over in Blighty for carrying too many keys.

Stoatie, I hardly knew ye’; I hope you’re making the right decision.

 


Comment from porknbean
Time: October 31, 2008, 12:26 am

Blighty needs to get over their paranoia and have themselves their own ‘tea party’.

We, ourselves, need another one. Throw every damn commie out.

 


Comment from Gregory the First
Time: October 31, 2008, 4:38 am

At least I can still carry my Swiss army knife around as my keychain…

… and our idiot pollies can wave huge honking serrated wavy daggers around when giving speeches.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 31, 2008, 7:46 am

The only time I’m ever without a pocket knife is stepping on a plane. I’d feel thoroughly nekkid without one.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 8:18 am

Somewhere in the world is the pile of pocket knives I’ve lost over the decades. After the last (and quite pricey) one, I quit trying to carry a knife.

Now I carry a .357 double-barrel American Derringer with hand-made custom loads. It kicks like a friggin’ mule (especially the top barrel), but at 15 feet or less – and after years and 1000’s of rounds of practice – , I’m deadly with it.

But it won’t cut string or rope or plastic wrappings worth a shit.

 


Comment from Pupster
Time: October 31, 2008, 8:34 am

Steamboat,
A .357 Derringer? Holy crap. That’s going to leave a mark.

I’m intrigued by your views and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 8:47 am

Yep. Am. Der. model M-1 in stainless steel with rosewood grips. It’s actually my second one: the first one was retired after over 10 years of service and countless rounds.

I used to get a kick out of letting folks shoot it. The bottom barrel isn’t too bad – but that extra ~3/4-inch of lever-arm length up to the top barrel really increases the torque when it fires.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 31, 2008, 8:55 am

Holy carp, McGoo! This one?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:01 am

Must. Have. THIS. GAME:

Yeah, it’s real. They’ve injected two new playable characters into an existing game.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:08 am

On making guns and knives illegal:

The liberal/peacenick mindset is an interesting delusion. They proceed as if the act of pretending that something is so will cause it to be so: that pretending that an assertion is true will actually change objective reality.

For example, take the idea that “If there were no weapons, there would be no violent crime”.

Step one is to pretend its true. Step two is to get rid of all weapons. Step three – then a miracle occurs! – there is no violence!

The reason for this delusion – I believe – is because liberals are dominated/enslaved/”in touch with” by their perceptions – and their close cousin; “feelings” – rather than by objective fact. I sometimes question whether liberals really understand the concept of “fact” accurately. They certainly do seem to subscribe to the belief that perception and feeling trump objective fact every time.

Bad idea – that. Nasty ol’ Reality trumps feeling and perception every time.

A liberal thinks that (because perceptions rule) if one can change perceptions then one can truly change reality. And in one narrow sense they are right. Perceptions influence peoples’ chosen (and unconscious) behavior. But perceptions don’t influence physical reality. This is the disconnect amongst liberals. They don’t grasp that objective reality doesn’t choose to be as it it.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:14 am

That’s the very one, Weaz. Warning: the stainless steel versions all seem to have quite stiff latch mechanisms. The barrel hinge (that lump on top at the back with the pin in it) is quite stiff until one works it a few hundred times. On my second one, I had it disassembled and re-machined a itty-bitty bit to loosen it up.

Made in Waco, Texas – of course!

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:32 am

Drudge is reporting that Obama has kicked off his plane reporters that work for newspapers that endorsed McCain.

Anybody see a pattern here? Joe the Plumber, newspaper reporters, TV stations, Preacher Wright, his own (white) mother, his first book publisher, etc. All banned or dumped or screwed.

Hello Germany – circa 1938. It’s only a ballot box away.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:43 am

Preaching to the choir, McGoo.

Oh, I do have an electoral dilemma, though. When I went home last year at Thanksgiving, I deliberately registered as a Tennessee voter, to help make Tennessee my home base in the States. I thought I’d be long gone by election time (nearly made it, too!).

So, am I okay to vote in RI one last time? I’m registered elsewhere, but it’s obviously too late for an absentee ballot. Is it a problem as long as I don’t vote in two places?

Neither state is a battleground — Tennessee is deep red, RI is deep blue. There aren’t any interesting races in either one. I’d rather not vote than foul myself up here, obviously…but it goes against the grain not to vote. Especially this year.

 


Comment from apotheosis
Time: October 31, 2008, 9:45 am

I’m blah today. Blah, I tell you.

Drudge is reporting that Obama has kicked off his plane reporters that work for newspapers that endorsed McCain.

Well sure. Enemies of the state don’tchaknow.

Buck ofama.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 10:12 am

That’s a tough one, for sure and certain, Weasel.

I would view it from a practical repercussions standpoint and “my” answer would differ from yours. I won’t be moving to Englandia right afterwards. “I” would vote in the state-of-most-recent-registration, since that would be my “most recent act” and my intended long-term state address (eventually). You can probably do as you choose so long as you vote in only one state (which I am quite sure is a “given” with you).

But of course I’m usually wrong on such things.

But vote, Stoaty. It’s the only power (pitiful though it be) we have over our elected masters.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 31, 2008, 10:18 am

Well, I think it’s too late for an absentee ballot to Tennessee. Or a quick trip down there. It’s going to be RI or nothing, at this point.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 31, 2008, 10:26 am

Go for it, Weaz! I’ll send you care packages and derringers in prison!

Actually, (if) you vote in RI, and (if) someone happens to notice, and (if) someone also happens to notice you’re registered in Tn, and (if) they assume falsely you’ve voted twice,and (if) they get on it right away, and (if) they manage to catch you before you get outa the US, and (if) it comes to legal action, you have a pretty good defense. Reasonable and Sincere Intentions, and past activities (none in your case), count for a lot. I’d vote in RI and eff the election folks.

 

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