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Because I’m retentive, that’s why

blogroll

Y’all know Brits called toilet paper “bog roll,” right? I’m as sure as can be that’s where the term “blogroll” comes from.

Anyhoo…updated mine. This is not as easy as it sounds. I don’t like the built-in WordPress blogroll manager, on account of it does stupid things like alphabetizes blogs that begin with “the” under “t”. But I didn’t want to drop it into my sidebar code because I shuffle the stuff in my sidebars so much. So I saved blogroll.php as a separate file and pull it into my side bar with an <include> tag.

Because I’m retentive, that’s why.

Now, I couldn’t just absorb the master list of moronblogs Conservative Belle assembled. Noooo. Some of the blogs were listed by owner name, and some by blog name. And some of them (Protein Wisdom comes to mind) have a relationship with AoSHQ, but I don’t really think of them as moronblogs proper. If you held a Zippo to my toes and made me cough up a definition — a thing I expect to happen any day now — I’d say a moronblog is a blog started by an Ace reader who woke up one morning and thought, “Waaaaaait a minute! I drink! I cuss! I have opinions! Why not me?”

So I’ll be tinkering with the thing for quite a bit until I have it just right. Because I’m…well, you know what I am. Only, I can’t edit my blogroll from work, because I can get to my WordPress dashboard, but not my BlueHost dashboard. Any editing of my blogroll happens in the narrow window between when I get home and when I am too snockered to shuffle around in the guts of my own blog.

The moronosphere links are a departure. Up until now, my blogroll was my daily reading list. I liked them all. I know there are some excellent blogs in the moronosphere (many of you should’ve been on my blogroll ages ago; I apologize), but I know there are some I won’t much like (not naming names, rhymes with “Mabriel Galor”) and I’m getting all wadded up figuring out who updates often and where I left comments. In short, I’m going nuts trying to absorb so many new links into my habits.

I don’t think you people appreciate how hard it is to be retentive.

Anyhow, for anyone who wants to pinch my work-in-progress version of the moronroll, you can look at in isolation at this link. If I remember correctly from my WordPress days, if you view source that page, copy the text and paste it into a text widget, you can drop it on your WP sidebar.

Squeak if you think an edit should be made. I want to keep this as accurate as possible. Re-ten-tive.

sock it to me

Comments


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: April 9, 2008, 2:59 pm

“Waaaaaait a minute! I drink! I cuss! I have opinions! Why not me?”

Perfect – except you left off the part about “…And I’m just as moronic as that numbnut Ace – and I can prove it!”

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:07 pm

I still haven’t worked out how long you have to go without an update before I draw a line through your blogname.

This is not a rebuke. It’s to help me remember not to click the link when I do my rounds. I can’t tell you how many times I stood outside Purple Avenger and Dave in Texas’ moribund blogs, looking pitiful, before I did a strikethrough.

 


Comment from bmac
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:11 pm

Malor actually has a pretty good sense of humor, at least as far as getting relentlessly picked on, and not taking it personally.

But he is B-O-R-I-N-G.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:23 pm

Weaz – I just installed your latest piece of artwork! Loverly!

Thanks to Sinistar, of course.

 


Comment from someone
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:41 pm

rhymes with “Mabriel Galor”

Every village needs an idiot?

 


Comment from Gabriel Malor
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:52 pm

Wow, I just got called out. Like, three times.

Gabe is a sad panda.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:54 pm

I do have to give him points for that, bmac. If people started screaming “you suck!” every time I posted something, I’d run crying off the stage.

And into the basement, where I would begin pushing doses of Rat-B-Gone neatly into the bottom of every piece of chocolate in a dozen Whitman Samplers, before…

…say, anybody else get a box of chocolates in the mail this week?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 3:55 pm

Oh, ummm…hi, Gabriel. Gosh, it’s been a…well, fancy seeing you here.

So.

How’s it going?

 


Comment from bmac
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:11 pm

Did I say boring?

I meant “has a knack for showing up at the most inopportune times.”

Typo.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:13 pm

Yeah, I’m pretty sure I misspelled, “really kind of grows on you over time” up there.

Spelling. Never my strong suit.

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:30 pm

You know, that would have made quite a good comedy sketch.

In a toe-curling sort of way.

 


Comment from bmac
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:37 pm

He did the same thing a while back at the Hostages. They were tearin’ him a new one, and all of a sudden it’s like:

Hey…uh…what’s up Gabe? Umm….yeah, nice legal opinions there….umm….

Totally sucked the air out of the thread. It’s like he has a “Morons are dissing me” sixth sense.

He was very cool about it though.

Like I said, great guy!

I said that right?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:39 pm

Like Scarlett O’Hara, showing up at the party in that big ol’ red dress.

 


Comment from Stashiu3
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:50 pm

I must be in the minority because I like his stuff. The international law stuff, even though I disagree with some of it, is well-reasoned and honest which is what I like most in a blog. I’ve never understood the antipathy people have towards his writing. Ace must recognize the talent there if he gives Gabriel free reign to co-blog pretty much whatever he wants. Plus, his posts can generate massive traffic when he takes a contrarian position, so he certainly gets people to think.

Just sayin’

 


Comment from Gabriel Malor
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:58 pm

I stumbled over here because people were clicking over to my mimeo-blog and I wondered why. bmac, I showed up at the hostages that day because someone tipped me to it.

Whoops. Need to clarify: “someone” didn’t tip me, just a person who saw it over there. Heh.

Weasel, I love your stuff. I especially miss the weather report.

 


Comment from Pupster
Time: April 9, 2008, 4:58 pm

The preceding uncomfortable silence was brought to you by…teh internets: where ceiling cat is watching you type.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:04 pm

I think AoSHQ has reached that point that having fresh content constantly going up is more important than the content itself. I used to think he was damaging his brand by letting his co-bloggers (even the ones I like) take on so much of the load. But he’s gone from strength to strength since then, so I’m obviously an idiot.

And I’m certainly not inclined now to go back through the archives and pick out key Malor Posts and Why They Drove Me to a Foamy Rage.

I’m a weasel, not a pitbull.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:06 pm

Ohhhhhhhh…yesssssss…rub it in good, Gabe.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:07 pm

I really need to start refreshing the thread before I post. I’ve stepped on my own dick twice in this thread, and I haven’t even got a dick.

Incidentally, I think lauraw is fully as funny as ace (maybe not counting back when he did long posts of schtick). Of all the co-bloggers, she’s the one who best fit the brand.

Or maybe it’s a girl thing.

 


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:17 pm

I also like Gabe. Partly because of what I assume he’s doing (which I do all the time in real life): playing advocatus Diaboli. Notice, at least as far as I have seen, how he doesn’t get involved in certain debates where he takes a contrarian stance. In others, he’s in there with the rest of the commenters.

Thick skin he has. Kudos just for that.

 


Comment from Lemur King
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:40 pm

I don’t think you people appreciate how hard it is to be retentive.

Uh… doesn’t “anal retentive” have a hyphen?

Of course booze makes it harder to blog. Tuh. Which is why I suggest switching to nitrous oxide. Smaller molecule so it’s by definition less bad for you (“Sangamon’s Principle” – Zodiac by Neal Stephenson)

 


Comment from someone
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:43 pm

“Ace must recognize the talent there if he gives Gabriel free reign to co-blog pretty much whatever he wants.”

Heh. Ace is lazy.

 


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:47 pm

I agree with the lauraw point. I think she’s a hoot. (Not to ruin her image, but she’s really sweet too.)

I also like Gabe for others reasons: he’s stronger than he lets on, and takes lots of flak for it. Let he who can see, see. He represents a demographic we need to grow. Sure, I don’t agree with him, but at least I like having my opinions challenged by someone I feel safe around. I know Gabe, at least, won’t go all Dem on me (I actually typed out “Demon” initially) and start up with identity politics and A Greater And Better Society Through Socialism, y’know?

Hating on him has become part of the AoSHQ schtick, and I think it’s a mark of genius that he’s able to evoke such a strong sense from the moron community.

Even contrarians help us hone what we believe and why.

 


Comment from bmac
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:56 pm

I think the anger towards Gabe started when he first showed up at Ace’s, and was kind of a dick to some long time morons. Some people never got over it.
He’s gotten better about that stuff, especially after getting abused on a regular basis. He sincerely seems like a nice enough guy.
For the fast paced tempo at Ace’s, some people just get bored with his stuff.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 5:57 pm

Yes, there’s a hyphen in anal-retentive. I decided to leave off the ‘anal-‘ part. It’s so…ugly. And you know what happens to McGoo’s blood pressure when you mention poop chutes.

 


Comment from Gabriel Malor
Time: April 9, 2008, 6:18 pm

Muslihoon, thanks for your support, but dude. Dude. “Contrarian” is not a happy label. That’s the nice way to call somebody an asshole.

Guys, I write what I write because it’s what I believe. But I’m always happy to be told I’m wrong so long as the person backs up their argument to the best of their abilities and is generally polite about it. The absolute worst fate is being ignored (which is why I measure success by length of comment threads).

Also–to steal a phrase from the recently departed–Ace gave me the biggest megaphone I’ve ever had. I’ll stop when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.

bmac, I know of only one regular who has a legitimate grievance from the early days. But that’s half my problem. I can never tell what’s going to piss people off.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: April 9, 2008, 6:29 pm

Weaz, that sentence about poop chutes will be on Google in five, four, three….

GM – keep writin’. If ya aren’t pissing off someone, then you shouldn’t be over there at Aces. He doesn’t pay you all that Valu-Rite to be a pussy. Most of the morons have thick skins (and skulls, etc) anyway, and the others … well, fuck ’em!

 


Comment from Anonymous
Time: April 9, 2008, 6:34 pm

Uh… doesn’t “anal retentive” have a hyphen?

Funny – I thought it required a full colon.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 9, 2008, 6:41 pm

Niiiiiiiice. Who was that masked punster?

 


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: April 9, 2008, 6:58 pm

What Pajama Momma said about Our Most Gracious Host:

s weasel is the best chick evah. If she had been born a dude, she’d have been the best dude evah.

 


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: April 9, 2008, 7:09 pm

You believe what you post, Gabe? Oy.

Well, then I am an anus too. I love being contrarian. On some issues. Only in real life so peeps know I’m not serious.

 


Comment from LemurKing
Time: April 9, 2008, 10:25 pm

Hey, let’s even ponder what Weas would be as a guy. She’s just fine the way she is. Accept no substitute.

Crap, McGoo, I forgot ’bout your chutes issues. I’ll try to be more sensitive in the future. Not so sensitive that I wear deodorant that smells of wildflowers and shame, but more sensitive nonetheless.

Totally off topic, which I seem to be doing a lot of lately (apologies)… but in England, what grit of toilet paper… errr… bog roll is the norm? At work I taped labels to the extra rolls, “80 grit”, “120 grit”, and “220 grit” just for fun. Cost cutting measures are not “poop-chute” friendly.

And yes, “Full colon”… nice. Very nice. Kudos. Kind of a nasty visual, but kudos all the same.

Contrarianism is fine if it is an occasional thing. It’s darned healthy, actually. If it occurs without fail every time, yep, we’re redlining into “asshole” territory. Honestly I haven’t seen that happen enough to trip alarm bells.

 


Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 9, 2008, 11:44 pm

*points at Weasel and laughs*

I’m still offended by Malor’s Challenger comment, though. I’ve seen the footage enough times in engineering ethics, thanks, and that is the death of seven real people to me, not some sort of intellectually interesting curiosity.

 


Comment from LemurKing
Time: April 10, 2008, 1:07 am

Mrs. Peel – You’re catching me in a very rare serious mood. I didn’t catch the Challenger comment. Could you point me to it?

As an engineer in related areas, one of the worst nightmares is to know that you played a part in something that went wrong. The nightmare that would make me suicidal is if I had known I was involved in injury or loss of life.

We can’t discount using it as an example of lessons learned but to use it as a curiosity or worse, a joke, that’s reprehensible.

 


Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 10, 2008, 8:13 am

Here. I don’t think he was necessarily being prurient, but I’m an engineer too, and I’ve met Roger Boisjoly. The comment just struck me as incredibly callous and having a complete disregard for the loss of life and the horror of the situation. I felt almost the same way I would if, ten years from now, someone said, “If you’d like to watch footage of people leaping from the Twin Towers to their death, here it is. So sad.” And I’m actually a year or two younger than he is, so it isn’t a generational thing as his comment seems to imply.

 


Comment from LemurKing
Time: April 10, 2008, 8:34 am

Thanks Mrs. Peel – Yeah, I saw Roger Boisjoly back in college when he came and gave a speech/seminar at OIT. It really struck a chord with me. The most important thing I got out of his talk was that there is this schism between engineers and managers and they live in different worlds and are driven by different things, and the two don’t always recognize the order of magnitude of difference.

Thanks for the link – I will hunt it down this afternoon when I get a chance.

 


Comment from Cuffy Meigs
Time: April 10, 2008, 11:38 am

bmac, I know of only one regular who has a legitimate grievance from the early days.

Hello!
http://minx.cc/?post=241536

 


Comment from Gabriel Malor
Time: April 10, 2008, 1:07 pm

Wow, and now I’m pissed off. Mrs. Peel, my comment on the Challenger anniversary was not meant to be an expression of “intellectual curiosity.” I’d actually never seen the footage before that moment and thought others might benefit from seeing it like I just had. It was an important moment in world history and a formative one for many teens and young adults at the time–if the comments at Ace’s and elsewhere on that anniversary are any indication.

You’re offended because it was callous? Wow. This is what I’m talking about when I say I never know what’s going to set someone off. Wow.

Cuffy, you’re not still mad at me, are you?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 10, 2008, 1:25 pm

Yay! This is like watching the Oxygen Network! (Which I’ve never actually done, but I gather it is chock full of vagina).

Also, somebody Stumble-Uponed Zombie Reagan, so it is a good day to be a weasel. Has anybody else been Stumbled? Is it an acute thing or chronic or what…?

 


Comment from Cuffy Meigs
Time: April 10, 2008, 1:44 pm

No, not mad. Just joining the conversation here with an anecdote.

 


Comment from Gabriel Malor
Time: April 10, 2008, 1:55 pm

In case that wasn’t clear, you were the regular I was thinking of, Cuffy. If anyone else has an issue, they should poke their hand up and remind me. It’s always fun to relive that kind of thing.

I don’t know what’s on Oxygen, Weasel, but can we have a Very Special Reconciliation now? With the crying and the surprise guests?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 10, 2008, 2:00 pm

Okay, but I warn you: I think there’s hugging involved.

 


Comment from LemurKing
Time: April 10, 2008, 2:18 pm

No hugs. Crying maybe. How about buying each other e:beers?

Isn’t Oxygen kind of like “We’re All Victims” Channel? I swear there’s one of those channels that should be called “The Man-Hater’s Channel” – it is just filled chuck-a-block full of [pick a group] who have been treated badly by men stuff.

 


Comment from Beth
Time: April 10, 2008, 2:22 pm

somebody Stumble-Uponed Zombie Reagan, so it is a good day to be a weasel.

Sweet! Everyone else has to stumble/thumbs-up it now too, so it’ll stay in rotation. Moar stumbles = moar hits!

Is it an acute thing or chronic or what…?

Acute, but can be chronic if people keep giving it a thumbs-up as time goes on. It’s better than a big Digg, if you ask me, because Digg traffic disappears forever after a couple days. Stumbles can bring traffic in for a LONG time, for the right posts. Zombie Reagan is the perfect kind of thing for a long run on Stumble.

Gabriel, no issues here, dude! 🙂

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 10, 2008, 2:27 pm

Thanks, Beth. I’m not above thumbs-upping myself, but the Stumble toolbar behaves badly at work, and I use Opera at home. The time I did spend on it, it seemed to have a real preference for eye candy. I saw some great Flash thingies, Stumbling around.

 


Comment from Dave in Texas
Time: April 10, 2008, 3:18 pm

Purple Avenger and Dave in Texas’ moribund blogs, looking pitiful, before I did a strikethrough.

Awwww, you big sweetie. I didn’t take it as a rebuke at all, it was the right thing to do.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: April 10, 2008, 4:28 pm

O Lord, I have stumbled(upon) and been, in turn, stumbled-upon. Thou knowest me well, O Lord, but thou knowest not my wrassling*.

*apologies to James Baldwin

 


Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 10, 2008, 6:52 pm

Gabriel,

I felt almost the same way I would if, ten years from now, someone said, “If you’d like to watch footage of people leaping from the Twin Towers to their death, here it is. So sad.”

I can’t describe how I felt any better than that.

“Offended” was not the right word. I’m not actively upset now (I was then). I look back on your comment as evidence of a fundamental disconnect between us, just as I would see my above hypothetical as evidence of a disconnect.

So, it’s not like I go around saying, “Ooo, that Gabriel Malor makes me so mad, I could just…Ooo!” All it means is that I don’t want to be pretend internet friends with you. I am sorry if I’ve genuinely upset you, though I must admit that I find it difficult to believe that anyone could possibly give a shit about what I think.

 


Comment from Cuffy Meigs
Time: April 10, 2008, 10:32 pm

Sorry I couldn’t expand earlier (slammed today), but Peel captures my attitude pretty well, GM. While I’m no longer mad and don’t exactly hold a grudge, we’re not pals. The original attitude you copped and the subsequent (and remaining) non-acknowledgement of said dickishness is just…you, I suppose. So I’ll go back to happily skipping certain posts.

 

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