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You know what’s enigmatic? How people can be such BONEHEADS

mona lisa's smile

Augh! Some days I think the world exist to make a maniac outta me! So Deutche Welle does this little video feature about analzying Mona Lisa’s smile using computer programs designed to read human emotions. You know, in order to figure out what she was thinking while she was sitting for her portrait.

Hey, I can tell you what Mona Lisa was thinking. She was thinking, “Shit! That doesn’t look a thing like me! How much are we paying this old geezer?”

See, folks, Leonardo only knew how to draw one lady mouth, and you’re looking at it. Thirteen times. I went to the Artchive and grabbed every single smiling woman’s mouth drawn by LdV that I could find, and here they are.

As sure as the Simpsons are yellow…


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: September 18, 2007, 2:57 pm

Well, when you’ve got something working for you go with it! Speaking (or writing I suppose) of iconic images, I guess we are stuck with having Einstien as our default image for all sciencey / geniusey things for quite some time to come eh? Do you think he’ll ever be replaced?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 18, 2007, 3:03 pm

Ha! I was thinking, “wow! What I coincidence. I was thinking exactly…” then I realized you had the same thought because you just watched the same video.

I suppose Germany can be forgiven for having a little Einstein envy…

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 18, 2007, 4:17 pm

Well, paint me blue and call me a bonehead. I thought LdV’s ML smile was enigmatic. Never occurred to me that there could be something more logical than LdV’s superhuman effort to baffle us modern peoples. Like, that’s the only type of smile he can draw/paint/etc. Makes sense.

But then sense isn’t a strong forte for various people.

Thank you for hammering in one more nail into The Da Vinci Code‘s coffin. (That book is one that I absolutely hate. I probably hate that book more than Hell and Satan combined.)

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 18, 2007, 4:18 pm

And, better Einstein than someone else!

Oh, Godwin: thou shalt never rest.

Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: September 18, 2007, 4:53 pm

I think we would be sorta weirded out if LvD went a different direction re: smiles dontcha think?

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 18, 2007, 5:01 pm

Terry Pratchett!!! Well, not really. But, anyway. Terry Pratchet!!!! Yay!

I have yet to read his books, although what little I have read about them indicates to me that they will very well be worth it.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 18, 2007, 5:17 pm

mona weasel

It’s an oldy. Couldn’t resist…

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 18, 2007, 5:36 pm

And, Musli, it’s the art historians and pundits that piss me off. The casual appreciator of fine art can be forgiven for not knowing Mona Lisa’s smile was common as muck (not only was it the ONLY one Da Vinci could draw, it was stylistically typical of the era).

edited to add: Oh! And as for the Da Vinci Code…I don’t get it! If you’re not a Christian, it means nothing to you. If you are a Christian, it’s a pack of offensive nonsense. So who was this thing supposed to appeal to? (No, I didn’t read it. I’m in column 1, and I truly didn’t care).

Still…I guess it appealed to a lot of people.

Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: September 18, 2007, 6:50 pm

Hey, now! Granted he didn’t use much variety in the facial expressions in his paintings, but it’s a bit overmuch to state that he was utterly incapabale of doing so. I mean come on – really?

Comment from Dawn
Time: September 18, 2007, 7:00 pm

Mona Lisa was preggers! Who knew?

Comment from lizardbrain
Time: September 18, 2007, 9:34 pm

And kids! His contemporaries had a lot of trouble depicting children. They all look like small, ugly, deformed adults. Apparently artists of the time were too busy to actually look at kids while (or before) painting them.

Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: September 19, 2007, 3:50 am

But kids are small, ugly, deformed adults. That’s why I’m doing the world a favour by hoying rocks at them whenever I see ’em.
As far as Mona Lisa’s ‘smile’. Some say enigmatic, I say an expression of contempt, boredom or trapped wind.
for those of you who appreciate La Gioconda, thank your lucky stars that da Vici could be arsed to finish it. I hear he was mighty lazy.

Comment from porknbean
Time: September 19, 2007, 9:09 am

No, kids turn into small-minded, ugly, deformed adults. Like this one. You’ve seen ‘him’ before. What would be more painful, beyond the video, a rock or a taser turned up to ‘fry’?

Comment from Lokki
Time: September 19, 2007, 12:17 pm

While Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters
Sons of bankers, sons of lawyers
Turn around and say good morning to the night
For unless they see the sky
But they can’t and that is why
They know not if it’s dark outside or light

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 19, 2007, 12:41 pm

Heh. Funny. I drove out of my usual radio station range on Sunday, so I rummaged in the glove compartment for a CD. First thing I put my hands on was Madman Across the Water. Hadn’t listened to it in years…

Comment from Lokki
Time: September 20, 2007, 11:53 am

Elton John was really quite good in his early years.
Tumbleweed Connection was a good album as was one called

I mentally filed him away as the love-child of Liberace and Kiss after “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road”.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 20, 2007, 12:16 pm

Oh, I know. I went to see him in concert in 1975, expecting to see a quiet young man in round glasses playing the piano. Instead, I got a screaming queen in platform shoes and feathered shades. I was a little taken aback (she said with masterful understatement).

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