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Nice army you got there, Billy Joe-Bob Bubbah

Remember these guys? The <snort> Hutaree? Scary right wing militia fixin’ to take over the gubmint and all?

Today, a judge dropped all the charges, except a couple of the weapons violations. Turns out being a bug-fuck crazy redneck who hates cops and knows how to build a pipe bomb isn’t actually sedition. Apparently, you actually have to commit a crime or something.

David Stone was recorded saying he was willing to kill police and even their families. He considered them part of a “brotherhood” — a sinister global authority that included federal law enforcers and United Nations troops…David Stone suspected Germany and Singapore had aircraft stationed in Texas, and thousands of Canadian troops were poised to take over Michigan. He said the government put computer chips in a flu vaccine.

Looks like they were arrested for being members of my extended family. Say, you reckon these guys like the government a bit better now they’ve spent two years in jail without bond for Felony Runnin’ Yer Dang Fool Mouth?

Comments


Comment from Oceania
Time: March 27, 2012, 10:22 pm

One would expect a touch of compensation for illegal imprisonment.


Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: March 27, 2012, 10:29 pm

> and thousands of Canadian troops were poised to take over
> Michigan.

That’d mean we’d get … Detroit.

Oh HELL no.


Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: March 27, 2012, 10:56 pm

Yeah, they might be dumb inbred white trash, but there’s no law against it. And you know what? If you want to know what guys like this really are like watch Justified. Its not authentic, but its a damn sight closer than anything else I’ve seen.


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: March 27, 2012, 10:56 pm

It’s disturbing that the only guy who looks like he might still have a marble rolling around in his nugget, is the one with the mullet.

So it is illegal to discuss violence against cops (or “The Man”) unless it is done in the form of rhyme and sold by record companies?


Comment from JeffS
Time: March 27, 2012, 11:41 pm

That’d mean we’d get … Detroit.

What if we threw in Chicago? Would that help?


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: March 27, 2012, 11:48 pm

Hell, I don’t care if they take all of Illinois, as long as they don’t take the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. It’s my one of my favorite places, and there is a shit-ton of natural resources still there, not to mention the Great Lakes. Actually, they can have Lake Michigan, but they don’t get Superior. I gotta take a stand on that.


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 27, 2012, 11:55 pm

Doomsday Preppers, Lizard Lick Towing, The Kardashians…

Ladies and Gentlemen(if we have any ):

I give you the FUTURE OF REALITY TV. Gene Simmons is petrified.

*spit*

Waste of hemoglobin.

Sandy.


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 28, 2012, 12:19 am

Living in North Carolina, I have seen these types daily. HAving taken a trip to Connecticut to visit my terminal brother I also saw them in New York State. One guy at McD’s had fewer teeth than a meth head. And he was smoking a cig in the line in the restaurant.

They had breakfast Southern Style: They had GRIT. Not grits, but grit. And a biscuit best described as inedible.

Hillbillies? They’re all over and not just in the south. The worst flat out racists I know of are northerners who have moved to Florida, for whatever reason. They seem to hate everybody and everything.

That these mouth breathers were from where they were proves my point. Not much of a point, really.

Meh. Got nothing here.

Redneck, it’s all just a state of mind. But being Southern? Now that’s a whole different ball of wax.


Comment from Oceania
Time: March 28, 2012, 12:21 am

And you chastise me for pushing Eugenics?
Is Schizophrenia a common aliment in your society?
Being Irrational clearly is …


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 28, 2012, 1:05 am

Obi Wan says: I sense a disturbance in the force, like the sounds of thousands of sheep being molested on an island at the rear end of the world…oops, just New Zealand, where it’s spriingtime… sheep breeding season again.


Comment from rustbucket
Time: March 28, 2012, 1:47 am

Yeah, that’s the sound of his bare feet beatin’ a path to the meadow…he don’t want to get an ugly ‘un…


Comment from GregO
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:14 am

Ok for the ‘Made-For-TV-Movie’ about their dramatic plight I’ve got them all cast except the female. One of them is female, right?


Comment from Dennis
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:26 am

Is anyone but me reminded of the pictures of the people that assasinated Lincoln when you look at that lineup?


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:29 am

@rustbucket

Yeah, that’s the sound of his bare feet beatin’ a path to the meadow…he don’t want to get an ugly ‘un…

Those hurt most? Sheep and Kiwi marriage brokers.

*still snorting over this one.no cola on my keyboard, thankfully*


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:32 am

Last one on the bottom row with the mullet?

C. Thomas Howell.

Explains his long career doubt. Been doing redneck dinner theater or something…


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:35 am

“That’d mean we’d get … Detroit.

Oh HELL no”

DAMNIT!! They’re on to us!!!!


Comment from Randy Rager
Time: March 28, 2012, 3:00 am

I’d damn sure rather hang out with these crazy ‘tards than any New Zealander one would care to name.

Be a lot less likely to catch Foot and Mouth Disease, for one thing.

Be a lot more likely to carry home some hi-damned-larious stories too, instead of the terminal stage syphilitic ravings one normally hears from the sheepshaggers.


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: March 28, 2012, 3:08 am

Dennis: Is anyone but me reminded of the pictures of the people that assasinated Lincoln when you look at that lineup?

Not me. John Wilkes Booth was a nasty piece of work, but he was very far from a inbred backwoods ignoramus. His father was an internationally famous actor. JWB attended fancy prep schools and became a successful actor himself, earning as much as $20,000 in a year.

John Surratt and David Herold grew up in DC, and were college boys. Lewis Powell was the son of a schoolmaster. He joined the Confederate Army at age 17, and by 1865 had served with Mosby’s Rangers and in the Confederate Secret Service. George Atzerodt had a carriage repair business. He lost his nerve and got drunk; but one worthless loser doesn’t condemn the whole group.

They weren’t crack operatives – but they were genuinely dangerous. Booth did kill Lincoln, and Powell stabbed Seward and very nearly killed him.


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: March 28, 2012, 3:51 am

The desperate search of Janet Napolitino for a dangerous white militia group has failed. I’ve always found it odd that they had to go that far into the deep woods to find someone dangerous to prosecute. I would think that the city of Dearborn would be a more likely productive place to search… or perhaps the FBI could stand outside voting locations and look for men in berets… might find somethin’ there


Comment from Mono The Elder
Time: March 28, 2012, 3:55 am

These are the same assholes that were/are blowing stuff up less than a county away from me.

Why did they let these guy’s go?

Oh, That’s right, Our judicial system has it’s head up it’s ass. That’s why. Everything makes sense now.

You look at that photo and they all have that “I’m a crazy psychopath. I’m going to kill you.” Look on them. You’d think that with all the stuff(and quite a bit is.) that seems to be spontaneously exploding around here you’d fine enough evidence to pin it on these guys. Or at least find out who is. (If they aren’t which I doubt it’s anyone else. guys a fruit.)


Comment from Oceania
Time: March 28, 2012, 8:24 am

That’s right … go to war with yourselves.


Comment from Oceania
Time: March 28, 2012, 8:29 am

Oh, and its almost Tupping Time here. Which ones to mate, which ones to cull, which Ewes to remove from the flock to improve economic output and improve the genetic fitness of the Flock. Cecil might be put to Stud this year.
I get so used to playing God that I naturally assume that you Americans – using that term loosely to indicate genetic unfitness – need to be managed, for your own benefit.
Because your gene pool needs to be drained, scrubbed cleaned and refilled with purer water … and all your defective infective Turds Flushed.


Comment from Mike C.
Time: March 28, 2012, 8:38 am

Maybe if we provided free airlift, we could get the Canadians to take California… Works for me, but they have to take the Ninth Circus in the deal.


Comment from JC
Time: March 28, 2012, 1:10 pm

They must be a militia – lookit how they’re all dressed the same, like uniforms or something!


Comment from David Gillies
Time: March 28, 2012, 1:24 pm

That lot look like the Graiai – one tooth and one good eye among ’em. Strange how the Anglo-Scot lumpenproletariat always look the goddamn same. This charming collection could be straight out of a Daily Mail story shrieking about dole scroungers, or an Australian Daily Telegraph article on some gang of feral bogans.


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: March 28, 2012, 1:42 pm

Mono –
I don’t think it can be disputed that these are a bunch of evil, ignorant, stupid (yeah, there’s a difference), and vicious bugfuckers. However they lack teeth in all senses of the phrase.

They weren’t charged with association in a group of eight or more whose cumlative IQ totals less than 100, or incest et al, they were charged with conspiring to overthrow the government.

They posed no more -threat to the government- than your aunt Fanny’s banjo playing poses to the Metropolitan Opera company.

They were arrested for propaganda purposes: to show that our friends the muslims are not the only dangerous terrorists threatening our great administration. I find it interesting that they couldn’t even find a decent KKK group out there to accuse, but had to settle for these pathetic inbreds to try to make their case.


Comment from mojo
Time: March 28, 2012, 2:59 pm

Dang! And we were this close to finally getting rid of Michigan…


Comment from Goober
Time: March 28, 2012, 4:11 pm

YOu know, it occurs to me that the feds going after them for doing pretty much nothing wrong but saying some nasty things may actually feed their paranoid delusions and escalate this situation.

All of their fears abotu the government were just proven in the last 24 months. Bug-fuck crazy? I guess I wonder, looking at this situation, who the crazy ones are – the folks who think our government is evil and say it out loud, or those of us who continue to delude ourselves into thinking that the feds still have our best interests at heart and are sometimes just misguided.

Given the fact that according to Janet Neopolitano, I’m a likely domestic terrorist, I wonder, truly, who the crazy people are. Time will tell.


Comment from Mono The Elder
Time: March 28, 2012, 4:21 pm

Some veg, Yep that’s pretty much it in a nutshell. There is someone going around exploding cars though. Might be them, might not be, but regardless, When car parts start raining from the sky, Mono gets nervous.

I also get nervous when driving through Dearborn. Same reason.

Like You said Some veg, seems like it’d be easier to find something to scare us with their than in my little corner of the world.


Comment from Mrs. Hill
Time: March 28, 2012, 4:51 pm

Cecil? Really?


Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: March 28, 2012, 6:19 pm

I wouldn’t go so far with the “ha ha look at how toothless and inbred they are” lines guys. Give them a different haircut, a better photographer, and a new suit and they’d fit in any Manhattan cocktail party. And their IQ would probably be pretty well commensurate.


Comment from Dave R
Time: March 28, 2012, 7:22 pm

So two years after being charged, the judge figures out there’s no case there after all. But as Mark Steyn says about hate crime litigation, the process is the punishment here. Two years out of work and imprisoned, legal expenses, your name and mug shot linked to an insurrectionist militia in google: that’s basically a win for the government, just without the longer sentence they wanted.

Add to that the pressure to take a plea deal, say 5 years instead of 30 if you fight it and are found guilty. There’s a systemic problem with over-charging when 95% of cases are resolved with plea agreements rather than a jury verdict.


Comment from Can’t hark my cry
Time: March 28, 2012, 7:45 pm

Christopher Taylor–y’know, I looked at those pictures and thought “my driver’s license photo doesn’t look all that much better than that.” Mug shots are not necessarily a reliable basis for judging much about character or intelligence.


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: March 28, 2012, 11:33 pm

I still say that last guy on the bottom row is C. Thomas Howell and he’s prolly delighted to see his face on something other than a milk carton…


Comment from Noelegy
Time: March 30, 2012, 8:23 pm

@Sandman, yes, that does look like C. Thomas Howell! He guest-starred on “Criminal Minds” not terribly long ago, and he looked, well, a lot like that, save the mullet.

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