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Holy shit! Narcissist much?


(Picture nicked from the Official White House Flickr stream, which is good for a laugh).

Whoa! Check out Obama’s signature. I don’t know what a handwriting expert would make of it, but you can take it from a graphic artist (um, that would be me): this is a signature that has been practiced and practiced and fussed over and tinkered with until it’s just the way he wanted it.

This guy filled pages in his notebook with this during Homeroom. And probably Algebra class, too.

This is the John Edwards’ Poofy Bouffant of signatures. And I don’t think it’s an accident that the “O” and the “b” make a sort of Popey orb thing, do you?

Obama’s a lefty, too — I mean, he is left-handed — which makes this even more a labor of love. Lefties have to hover-write to avoid blotting their own copy.

And check out the pen. All the recent guys had their own personalized pens (which they give away after bill signings), but did the others include the president’s signature? I couldn’t find a picture of Dubya’s pen (it was a Cross), but I found Obama’s pen’s coming out photo shoot.


To be fair, it does look a bit like Bush signed his documents “GERBIL.”


Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: April 29, 2009, 5:55 pm

Gerbil over BO any day.

Comment from dfbaskwill
Time: April 29, 2009, 5:58 pm

Handwriting experts will drool over your comparison post. My bet is Mr. Obama will not fare well in the categories of trust and “caring”. I would put up mine, but as a sort-of-doctor, mine doesn’t count.*

*podiatrist- US (chiropodist -UK)

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 29, 2009, 6:26 pm

I have actually been professionally paralyzed because I have a new name now and need a new signature. As I am an artard, this matters.

On the other hand, it could be I’m not working because I’m butt lazy.

Comment from Phineas
Time: April 29, 2009, 6:49 pm

Where’s the Hussein part
But if you try to read his signature it looks like
Bank Oboner

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 29, 2009, 6:55 pm

Bank Oboner! Hoot!

Comment from Deborah
Time: April 29, 2009, 7:34 pm

Incredible! He must have read that Cher practiced writing her name over and over when she was little, in hopes of the day when she would be a big star. No wonder he thinks so much like her.

Comment from Joan of Argghh!
Time: April 29, 2009, 7:52 pm

Wow! The bisected O is just disturbing; feminine in the extreme. *ahem*

Comment from Jeff
Time: April 29, 2009, 8:13 pm

Thought you’d said “This guy filled pages in his notebook with this during his Honeymoon“…but then, he probably did, too.

Comment from MCPO Airdale
Time: April 29, 2009, 8:19 pm

Gee! I should have expected more from an over-indulged, narcissistic, socialist-indoctrinated twit!

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 29, 2009, 8:37 pm

Yep, that is definitely a practiced signature. And it looks narcissistic to me, but then, I am biased.

My handwriting shows mostly that I don’t give a rat’s ass about my handwriting, despite constantly getting marked down for it in elementary school.

Comment from Mr. Bob
Time: April 29, 2009, 9:02 pm

My first thought was a bumper sticker… “Heart O”

Comment from Jessica
Time: April 29, 2009, 10:08 pm

Now I feel bad – I DID practice my signature over and over until I liked it – at different points in my life. When I come across something that I signed years ago, it’s always interesting (to me, anyway) to see how my sig has changed. Now that I am an administrator who has to sign things several times a day, I have shortened it to my first two initials and my last name, which is completely illegible, but kinda pretty.

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 29, 2009, 11:44 pm

Actually, my dad practices his signature, too, but it doesn’t look practiced, because it’s still normal handwriting. I think that’s what Weas was pointing out – this isn’t the kind of signature that would organically arise, even from someone practicing signatures. It was designed to be awesome.

The bisected O looks kinda like an on/off switch symbol to me.

Oh, and yes, I DO refer to my grades as my “marks.” And I call these shoes my “trainers.” Just one of the ways in which I like to pay homage to the mother country. (Although I don’t have any English heritage that I know of…)

Say, Uncle B/Gibby/Julia, is it common for people in Britain to have American heritage and/or relatives in America? Or are most people completely British with only a handful of furriners besmirchin’ the family tree? Just wondering.

Comment from JuliaM
Time: April 30, 2009, 12:42 am

“…is it common for people in Britain to have American heritage and/or relatives in America? “

I wouldn’t say ‘common’, but certainly mot unknown. Among my immediate circle of friends, colleagues and acquaintances, I can think of about 4 or 5 that have some US connection. At least two have relatives that have emigrated or retired there.

And I (briefly) had an American sister-in-law… 😉

Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: April 30, 2009, 5:08 am

Obama’s a lefty

No shit. That’s the complaint, right? The crux of the problem?

Not sure how common that is Mrs. Peel. None of my relatives has emigrated to America that I know of. A few went to Australia. The rest seem to’ve stuck around. I like to think they’re fascinated, like moths to an open flame, to see where this crazy ride is going to end.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 30, 2009, 5:30 am

A lot of the people I know here have kids or other relations that emigrated to Australia or Canada. A few South Africans or New Zealanders. Of course, a lot of the people I have met here I started conversations with in airports, so that probably doesn’t count.

The US? Not so much, probably because it’s REALLY VERY HARD to get into the US legally (and almost that hard, now that they’ve tinkered with the rules, to get into the UK legally). That’s what has some people especially flexed about our porous borders.

Jessica, I practiced the shit out of my signature (which is all wasted effort now, isn’t it?). If you’re a graphic artist — or a girl or something — it’s not so unusual. For a fifty year old academic to be that invested in his own stylistic awesomeness…a little strange.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 30, 2009, 5:34 am

My grandfather — my mother’s father — was the last person in the family to have a handwriting tutor. I don’t recall ever seeing his signature, but she said it was cool: his own three (or was it four?) initials superimposed over themselves.

Kind of what I’m going for in my next signature, I think.

Comment from Deathknyte
Time: April 30, 2009, 10:00 am

Oddly enough, I briefly had a British Brother in Law.

Comment from Adrian
Time: April 30, 2009, 10:14 am

I have always been very suspicious of people with stylized signatures; remember it was Heinrich Himmler who managed to twist his signature into the SS runes.

Even Himmler would tell Barry that he is trying too hard.

Comment from bad cat robot
Time: April 30, 2009, 11:45 am

When you are a Mad Scientist(tm), on the other hand, your signature is something like a smoking, glass-lined crater where a building used to be. Which is not to say we don’t *practice*. (I go for a raku type finish myself)

Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: April 30, 2009, 12:17 pm

Well, I’m the American relative of my dad’s side of the family(who live in mainly Britain and Australia). Granted, I’m also British, making it really easy for me to travel pretty much anywhere.

They still can’t understand why I like guns so much though.

Oh, almost forgot, I get to have my wisdom teeth removed today(yeah, I’m that young) and let me say, I’m glad I’m not in Britain for it. The last thing I need is some good NHS Dentistry.

Comment from Allen
Time: April 30, 2009, 1:34 pm

Did I die and get re-incarnated in high school? This is some spooky shit. I read the comments over at the flickr page. Holy crap!

He’s just so awesome, kingly, regal… We are so screwed.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: April 30, 2009, 3:07 pm

Good luck, RW!

Comment from jwpaine
Time: April 30, 2009, 3:43 pm

I had my wisdom teeth pulled when I was in the Navy (long long ago). The dentist comes in holding the x-rays and says “I estimate five minutes per tooth,” and then proceeded to pull all four in four minutes flat.

My mouth hurt like hell for days (I managed to talk a corpsman buddy of mine to slip me something stronger than the Darvocet they handed me on my way out of the dentist’s office: It was one pill, purple. I took it on a Friday night and woke up 8pm Sunday, mouth still hurting like hell).

It hurt so much I went back to the dentist, where I was scolded for not brushing my teeth in the interim (did I mention the mouth-pain?), and then subjected to about 10 minutes of high-pressure water-pic’ing and fart-noise vacuuming, and then sent away, mouth clean and hurting like hell.

The pain subsided somewhat after a while, and two weeks later I was watching a movie at my girlfriend’s house, eating popcorn, when I grabbed a toothpick to dislodge what I thought was a popcorn shell. The moment I poked the “shell” with the toothpick, an exquisite pain shot from my mouth all the way down to my feet and then came back up again, pausing only long enough to kick me in the direct objects.

I got a pair of needle-nosed pliers, got hold of the “shell”, and jerked it out. It was a half-inch-long crescent-shaped chuck of wisdom-tooth root, the tiny canal where the nerve had rested moments before very visible. And no, I didn’t pass out when I pulled that chunk of root out, but it was a close thing.

I did not visit a dentist again for 25 years.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: April 30, 2009, 3:50 pm

Gee, I hope RW’s gone already.

Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: April 30, 2009, 4:25 pm

Ok jwpaine – you just gave me the full-body heebie jeebies. Please not to be posting stories of your dental adventures ever again. BRRRR.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 30, 2009, 4:27 pm

As a counterbalance to jw, the day I had my wisdom teeth out was — hands down, no question about it — the happiest day of my life. They gave me an intravenous drip of Valium and Demerol and, let me say, it was a fucking PRIVILEDGE to be alive and breathing oxygen that day.

My mother poured me into the car afterwards and tried to get me to sign a check so she could buy my groceries (at least, she SAID that’s what it was for). I kept that check for the longest time. I signed it, “Ssssssssssssurrrr…”

I wanted to go back every day for the next month and have another tooth out.

Comment from MCPO Airdale
Time: April 30, 2009, 5:03 pm

The Navy dentist dislocated my jaw removing my wisdom teeth. Funny how so many of them have a hard time getting board certified when they get out of the service. Go figure!

Comment from Allen
Time: April 30, 2009, 5:12 pm

My wisdom teeth extraction was much like JW’s, but the Army version. You know you’re in for a wild ride when they put restraints on you, kind of like tying you down to the dental chair.

The “dentist” proceeded to yank ’em out. Of course it was a tougher job then he figured so he resorted to leverage by putting his knee on my chest and yanking upwards with all his might.

On the good side they gave me 2 whole days of light duty. On the third day I had to resume PT, which included a 5 mile run with a 40 pound rucksack. Sweet, sweet, miasma of pain. I did have some pretty good hallucinations though.

And people want government provided health and dental care? Sweet Jeebus.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: April 30, 2009, 6:07 pm

I forgot to mention that I ate all the Darvocet the dentist gave me the first afternoon, and then killed an entire 100-count bottle of aspirin that evening in my apartment. After a few hours of weird, manic behavior (I cooked some rice, which apparently required three pots, several plates, much silverware, cake mix, and bologna) accompanied by auditory hallucinations, I finally fell asleep on the sofa, ears ringing and mouth hurting like hell.

Comment from Tesla
Time: April 30, 2009, 7:05 pm

Used to practice my sig, too. I was intrigued with DaVinvi writing backwards and found I could do it with ease. I can also write it upside down AND backwards. Not claiming any bragging rights, though. I’ve found that my brain is not divides into 2 hemispheres but is split into 8 separate parts. Needless to say, 7 are missing.

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: April 30, 2009, 11:41 pm

I actually never had any wisdom teeth. I figure that’s karma for having had my upper left incisor become fully developed while still embedded in my palate. I had to get the baby tooth (which had a root on it 1/2″ long) pulled, have braces spread my teeth apart to make a gap, have oral surgery to remove a chunk of my palate, then had a wire attached to the incisor to sloooooowly (over the course of months) pull it down and turn it around (because it was facing the wrong direction) so the ortho could put a proper brace on it.

Anyway, thanks for the info. I was actually thinking farther back – my family’s been in the US long enough that I don’t know anything about the various ethnicities/countries of origin of my ancestors. I know (or at least assume) that mixed ethnicities is not common in Europe in general, but I was wondering if it was common for Brits to have American or French or Italian ancestors a few generations back, or for Brits to be aware of branches of the family that moved to America generations ago. (I’m assuming that many, if not most, Brits have distant relatives in America. But I’m guessing that most are not aware of it due to the mists of time, as I am similarly unaware of my ancestors.)

Speaking of Europe, now that I think about it, I guess it would be fairly common for French people to have German ancestors.

Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: May 1, 2009, 2:31 am

Hey guys,

The wisdom teeth are gone and I had a superb Oral Surgeon that did the job. I was knocked out for the actual removal. Hurts like hell afterward but I do have some lovely Oxycodone for that.

As for your stories about wisdom teeth removals, they’re all very interesting(and I was lucky enough not to get a chance to read them before I went). However, I must say, even though I’m quite a patriotic American and have always wanted to serve my country in the military…each and every time I hear about the wonders of military(or VA) healthcare it pretty much removes that urge.

But as said earlier, military and VA healthcare is the most useful argument against Universal healthcare in the United States. I don’t want the same bozos in charge of my healthcare.

Comment from JuliaM
Time: May 1, 2009, 1:03 pm

Having read the stories above of US military-based dentristry fun ‘n games, I can only wonder how the hell ‘waterboarding’ is suddenly considered ‘torture’ by the bleeding hearts…

Comment from Dawn
Time: May 1, 2009, 3:54 pm

I have a pen with George Bush’s signature. Got one with Laura Bush’s signature, too.

Our company made the RNC’s jewelry for a while and we supplied them with the pens.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: May 1, 2009, 4:02 pm

Well, then, I’ll give Obama that one. I’ve got a sudden hankering to buy one of them President O pens…and use it to draw unspeakably conservative things.

Comment from erik
Time: May 2, 2009, 7:47 pm


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: May 2, 2009, 8:42 pm

Wow, erik! I’m impressed! It’s really hard to freehand a circle that round…

Pingback from NOTUS | Autumn People
Time: May 4, 2009, 7:01 pm

[…] S.Weasel has an analysis of the NOTUS’s signature. Spot on. […]

Pingback from For Beauty Is God’s Handwriting « Track-A-’Crat: The Roll Call of Democratic Delinquency
Time: May 4, 2009, 7:36 pm

[…] Too beautiful.  S.Weasel has the measure of it. […]

Comment from Track-A-‘Crat
Time: May 4, 2009, 7:52 pm


Love it, you’re hilarious. And W’s does indeed look like “Gerbil.” Linked this through a post on my site and probably on No Quarter imminently as well.

Pingback from For Beauty Is God’s Handwriting : NO QUARTER
Time: May 4, 2009, 10:27 pm

[…] Too beautiful. S.Weasel has the measure of it. […]

Comment from Войска ПВО
Time: May 9, 2009, 2:04 am

..got directed over here by Track-A-‘Crat and am dying at the magnificent photoshop of Arlen Sphincter and this dissection of the Dear Leader’s over-practiced John Hancock. Aside from the spot-on commentary about Obama being left-handed and having to work that much harder to achieve such “perfection”, I am wondering how he gets it right when he signs bills and has to go through 10 or so souvenir pens for one signature.

Not sure how the topic of wisdom teeth pulling came up but my first extraction was on election eve in ’72. An extremely large Hawaiian dentist — I mean, we’re talking huge hulking Samoan type — worked for ten minutes on my tooth with those battery-pliers things before he had to take a break because his arm got tired.

I got loaded up with Darvon tablets and sent home to watch Richard Nixon get elected in a blissful haze.

(Now, don’t read too much into that; I voted for him — both times.)

Comment from free dental clinic in chicago
Time: October 14, 2012, 4:36 pm

I read this post fully about the resemblance of latest and preceding technologies,
it’s amazing article.

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