web analytics

Toiletpaper Week continues on sweasel.com


That’s him. That’s the little freak on my toilet paper.

I actually started the evening trying to find out why Bounty paper towels are called Plenty here. Turns out, Proctor and Gamble sold Bounty to SCA, a Swedish company, who decided to rebrand it. But, frankly, it looks EXACTLY the same, except it says “Plenty.”

Oh, and it’s two inches shorter. Because kitchen roll is smaller than paper towels.

Anyhow, it turn out SCA also owns Velvet, our house TP. And they’re in the process of rebranding that, for some reason. Let’s hope they get rid of Buttwipe Boy in the process.

SCA bought up Charmin in the deal, too. Which Uncle B says was a serious mistake, as — for some damn reason — Charmin clogged toilets up and down this green and pleasant land.

And that’s where I found this, which is some kind of promotional dealie for Charmin that’s, like, all New York City and pee jokes. Don’t get it.

I know. Lame post. I’m all bummed because I was set to watch the first online live famous brain dissection tonight, but either the server’s down or jammed or they’re blocking the UK.

No, really.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: December 2, 2009, 7:10 pm

Pennies to pounds it’s not a Greenie.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 2, 2009, 7:14 pm

Some background on the brain in question.

Comment from Allen
Time: December 2, 2009, 8:15 pm

Boy this place has sure gone in the toilet. Come on you knew it had to be said. 🙂

Comment from JeffS
Time: December 2, 2009, 8:32 pm

From Sweasel’s brain link:

H. M. could not remember day-to-day events, but he could learn new skills.

Sounds like most members of Congress. Except for the part about being able to learn something new.

Comment from iamfelix
Time: December 2, 2009, 8:51 pm

I watched some of that brain slicing. It reminded me of nothing so much as my (brief) stint training in the meat dept. of a small grocery where I worked right after HS. Well, somewhat less gore.

Speaking of (G)ore, I am so loving Climategate. I wonder if my 2 former work friends, who shunned me for being apostate, are paying attention?

Commercials have the power to make you crazy – It must be be the repetition, because even ones that aren’t too bad at first blush can quickly send you over the edge. Welch’s grape juice had some a few years ago with preternaturally wise-sounding urchins who, although cute, made me want to reach through the tube & wring their widdle necks. My dad used to hate “the Smucker’s voice” (as he always referred to it), which did not emanate from an adorable moppet, but Mason Adams. Even in the 70s, he was no spring chicken. Sadly, he and his voice-overs lasted a lot longer than my dad. Hmmmm … maybe they done him in!?

On a nicer note, I can has Stoaty swag!!1! I just got my handsome “unleash the weasel” mug today, and it’s a gem. My youngest cat Louis is inordinately fond of it already – spent the past couple of minutes licking it & sticking his head in it (yeah, he’s a bit strange). My “winger signal” postcards are arriving under separate wrapper – Can’t wait. Fine weasel products you got there, Stoaty.

Comment from steve
Time: December 2, 2009, 8:54 pm

I clicked on teh brain link and got right in…

They just started slicing it around 2 minutes ago

Comment from EZnSF
Time: December 2, 2009, 9:09 pm

OK. This is like the THIRD British TP post I’ve read on here. Sometime back it was TP hoarding and effective storage as home insulation .

I only hurried to the Weasel Hutch to perhaps post a link or comment on what I just picked up on Hot Air as another British TP travisty http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1232509/Order-order-extra-rolls-loo-paper-please.html#comments. Especially following yesterdays TP topic de jure. But come-on. I mean..I know the world is going to hell in a hand-basket, but is someone making the toilet paper connection?

I believe there must be a UK/TP/UFO/BBC/God-help-us sort of vortex going on that part of the world. I’m positive of it.

George Monbiot LIVES!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 2, 2009, 9:09 pm

Oh, dear. That means my ferrin IP is blocked. Dang.

Felix! New cat? Or have I not been paying attention? So glad you got the stuff; I haven’t ordered anything for myself yet. It comes out of California and I’m worried about HM Customs. Everybody says they make nice stuff, though.

Remember the riff SNL did on Smucker’s, back when their tagline was, “with a name like Smucker’s, it has to be good”? Hoo boy!

Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: December 2, 2009, 9:56 pm

All I have to say is…


And don’t squeeze the Charmin.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 2, 2009, 10:07 pm

Oh, shit. Roman Wolf’s gone zombie.

Somebody hand me my 12-gauge.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: December 2, 2009, 10:22 pm

“And don’t squeeze the Charmin”

Especially now that his stockboy has ready access to high explosives…… 😉



Comment from naleta
Time: December 2, 2009, 11:19 pm

For true zombie control, you need a flamethrower!

“I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”

Comment from armybrat
Time: December 2, 2009, 11:22 pm

I don’t give a damn who makes my TP or what it’s called, as long as it’s soft enough for my sweet, ummm, errr, parts. For many years I lived on a septic system and compromised on the TP loft factor (it’s expensive to pump and re-do a septic system clogged by really fluffy stuff). NO MORE! I’m a city girl and wipe my parts with the softest stuff I can find!!!! Liberation!!!

Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: December 3, 2009, 12:08 am

Here I was all set to make a Hans Delbrück joke about a “famous brain” only to find out that it really is an Abbey Normal one. AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

OH,and my sweazle zazzle swag showed up today too! The shirt’s a bit small, but I’m gonna ungrow into it. 😉

Comment from bad cat robot
Time: December 3, 2009, 1:33 am

I learns the most fascinating things at chez Weasel! I did not know the brain passed o’er was Hans Delbruck! That magnificent bastard, I read his book! (one of them, that is.) War in Ancient Times, an invaluable resource for those of us prone to fits of fantasy-type writing.

Oh, and re: Zazzle, I had to have a little chat (with pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one) since my Zombie Reagan sweatshirt was not just zombified, but appeared to have leprosy as well. A zombie-only replacement was whisked to my door! Good customer service. Yay, Weasel-swag!

Comment from Carl
Time: December 3, 2009, 3:57 am

thanks for the info! it was interesting to read about toilet paper )

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 3, 2009, 8:25 am

Wow, that IS good, bcr.

Can I ask — did it look like the dark of the shirt was coming through the highlights in the design? If so, that could be my fault and I need to fix it. Either way — hooray for customer support.

Comment from steve
Time: December 3, 2009, 9:21 am

I hadn’t realized how fixated you”Brits” were about your TP.

A nation of cornholios.

TP for my bunghole!


Comment from bad cat robot
Time: December 3, 2009, 3:00 pm

Weas, it looked like somebody sprinkled white lint over the graphic thingy. The shirt itself was a dark grey and the leprosy-specks were showing all over but most noticeably on the darker parts of the image. I am not an expert in matters textile but it seemed like a bad transfer or something like that. New shirt has no such issues. I had to send Zazzle a pic to prove I had a problem; I could send it to you if you like.

Comment from dmoss
Time: December 3, 2009, 4:44 pm

Congratulations on being ripped off by the Onion!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 3, 2009, 5:42 pm

Heh. Thanks, dmoss, but I reckon I made…oh, ten bucks off’n that link, flogging t-shirts on Hot Air. Anyhow, I didn’t invent ZReagan.

Nah, that’s okay, bcr. That doesn’t sound like what I feared: if you upload a design to a white t-shirt, they knock out all the white parts of an image. Then, if somebody puts it on a DARK t-shirt, all the bits of the design that are supposed to be white are dark. I haven’t quite mastered how to fix that, other than to upload it to a dark shirt first.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: December 3, 2009, 7:40 pm

Oh Dear… Pope AlGore the first has bailed on his Copenhagen high mass and ass kissing session for “unknown reasons”….. 😉


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 3, 2009, 8:27 pm

Not enough $1,200 handshake tickets sold to power his personal jet, I suspect.

Comment from Lemur King
Time: December 7, 2009, 12:13 am

All at once…

If you are going to be ripped off, the Onion is as good as any.

Braaaaains. Now in fresh spearmint flavor!

A while back some idjit over there in your neck of the woods published a wonderful article excoriating Americans for just about everything but mostly because we destroy the world by insisting on soft butt-wipes, the coarsest of which is 300% softer than the pope-endorsed 120-grit. I am surprised that you have advertisements there that admit to softness in hygienic toiletries.

Scubafreak, your link has made my weekend three times as good as it was. Thankyewverymuch!

‘felix… I hope the old co-workers are repentant. 🙂

Pingback from S. Weasel
Time: April 20, 2010, 10:57 pm

[…] lame. You kidding? This is vintage Weasel. Second time I’ve posted on this […]

Write a comment

(as if I cared)

(yeah. I'm going to write)

(oooo! you have a website?)

Beware: more than one link in a comment is apt to earn you a trip to the spam filter, where you will remain -- cold, frightened and alone -- until I remember to clean the trap. But, hey, without Akismet, we'd be up to our asses in...well, ass porn, mostly.

<< carry me back to ol' virginny