sweasel.com

Still, one of the cats tried to cheer me up by leaving a dead mouse in the kitchen.

And I got into a fight with a Corp Commie for using a company logo that didn’t have an ® after it. On a splash screen that only shows for a couple of seconds. And the stupid ® doesn’t show up at that size, anyway.

And I’ve had WAAAAAAY too much caffeine.

Uh-oh. Weaz is stoked on The Bean.

Huckabee is a dimwit. He’s a Rino – and a particularly un-subtle one at that. The Left is actually rooting for him because a) he’s more like them than he is like us Cons, and b) he will lose to any (D) they nominate.

Fred! actually represents my positions more closely than anyone else. And since Presidents are only as good as their advisers, all we need is to strap some high-power advisers onto him (think strap-on vibrating, multi-mode dildo) and he’ll be good to go.

Surely you’re not suggesting strapping something as potentially dangerous as a Two-Fisted Sister Twister to an actual Presidential candidate, Steam!

Remember: Safety First! (Then the trigger!)

And now I’m probably on some FBI watch-list because I mentioned “Presidential candidate” and “trigger” in the same post.

And now I’ve done it twice. Guess I can forget flying, or buying anything more threatening than a spork for the next 50 years.

Not even. Spork injuries are the third leading cause of accidental blindness in the industrialized world.

The first and second causes, of course, being shark-pestering, and Weasel-rassling, respectively.

Yep. You’ve put your foot in it this time, jw. On the bright side, you’ll never need a proctologists service again – so long as you are a frequent flier.

(And I can’t believe my dictionary did not have proctology in it!)

…and I have a photo of the ideal instrument for Fred! to strap on. It will instill lasting terror into the hearts of his enemies. But I will not sully this site with the link. Unless someone asks, of course. Heh.

What’s wrong with the Huckster? His record as governor of Arkansas? Jeez, some people are so picky.
From a foreigner’s perspective (for what that’s worth, absolutely nothing probably), it looks like Sir Rudolph ‘I cleaned up this fucking town’ Giuliani KBE is the only guy who can smack Hillary! upside her funny lesbian head. Or maybe Romney. It’s obvious to me that it’s his hair that’s in control. It’ll jump host to whoever wins the GOP nomination and control them instead, leaving Romney a withered, gray husk of a man.
Fred’s wife makes me feel funny in my underpants. If he wins, then the Whithouse can expect to garner unwanted attention for degenerate perverts like me and my mouthbreathing, knuckledragging bretheren.

No link necessary for me, Steam. My imagination is such that anything longer than it is wide makes me snicker.

I hear ya, jw.

Gibby, you put your finger on my one issue with Fred!’s campaign: his skank – er, I mean wife. She looks like one of those ladies around downtown Dallas that used to offer me Air Starts and ‘Round the Worlds. I’m sure she’s a nice lady – but Christ! the media would have a field day.

I heard her interviewed on some program. She sounds smarter than she looks. Which is good, because she sure looks like a hoochie mama. Wait, is there a ‘t’ in hootchie?

I have a problem with actors in politics, St Ronnie not withstanding. It’s too frank an admission of what all those guys actually are, only actors are moreso. Still, Thomson did do a good job mowing my cousin’s other grandmother’s lawn, so there is that.

I haven’t totally warmed to any of them. But I have staked out the list of people I absolutely under no circumstances can vote for. And, since it doesn’t look like I’ll get a primary vote this time, that’s good enough. You guys pick the nominee without me and I’ll weigh in later.

*eye roll*
(muttering)
She washes down cat opiates with cheap vodka and wonders where we are.

*outdoor voice*
Be right there!

I post this often: It’s ten-eleven friggin’ months until the election. ANYTHING can happen.

…and you’re right. Fred!’s wife is supposedly very bright. She just looks – well – for sale. Cheap.

Weaz – you should be resting up for your vacation! Save the cat-stuff for the holiday hangovers.

Fred! is still my man – even sent him money and thinking about sending him more. We’re trying to elect a president here, not a president’s spouse so I don’t care what she looks like. Huckabee is dangerous and likely get Hillery! elected if he gets the nomination. Grrr.

It’s all in the presentation with Jeri Thompson. Drape a couple of toddlers around and BAM! American Soccer Mom.

Will somebody explain to an old, puzzled badger why y’all (I’m learning) are putting exclamation marks after these people’s names?

Christ… feels like the first day at badger school.

Where has all the coffee gone?
And I don’t mean the decaf –
Where has all the coffee gone?
Pour me some Joe.
Where has all the coffee gone?
Steamboat drank it every drop
When will he ever learn?
When will he ever learn?

Where have all the FBI Agents gone?
Long time surveiling
Where have all the FBI Agents gone?
Speak into the flower now
Where have all the FBI Agents gone?
Watching JW every one
What secrets will they learn?
When will they learn?

Like all things wicked in this world of ours, Uncle B, a Clinton started it. A Hillary! Clinton, to be exact. It’s on all her signage that way.

And I did not scarf my cat’s pain medication. I thought about it, but I didn’t do it. Even though he didn’t finish and I have some left over (so, you know, double points to me for that). It must be bitter; he won’t eat his food if it has his meds on it. And his elbow seems fine.

And it’s not because it’s bitter. Bitter is good. Tonic is bitter. Xanax is bitter.

No, it’s about the shining golden virtue of restraint.

Where have all the cat opiates gone?
Poor cat is meowing
Where have all the cat opiates gone?
That bottle’s empty now
Where have all the cat opiates gone?
Weasel did not neither swallowed every one
She drank vodka instead
She drank vodka instead

Better?

Vodka. Oh, that sounds heavenly. Yes, let’s.

I got the car stuck again coming back. A bit more ice crushing was in order. Then I had to do the front walkway and the bck stairs. Put the garbage out. I spent the weekend on one last push trying to clear up upstairs so workmen can come in while I’m gone, so I really started the day with zero reserves and I’ve driven myself into the ground the whole way. I’m whupped, laddies and gennlemong.

Weaz – you should go rest. Take a nap. I just did.

Ah-hah! Lokki’s Muse has been at it! Oh, good.

Very nice, Loki.

You’re quite amusing when worked up.

Although I must advise the respected denizens of this here blog: considering political developments, it is now “Hillary?” rather than “Hillary!”. You have been advised accordingly and now have no excuse for the Grammar Gestapo.

Lokki –

There’s someone over at IMAO:

(http://www.imao.us/archives/009337.html/#comments)

that’s pretty damned good with the ol’ poem-stick. Its comment #12.

You’re right, Musli, I hope.

Every time I read that even the MSM is looking askance at her and her chances, I dare to hope the bitch will just go away.

Lokki – I have a couple haiku etc of encouragement all ready for Pixy Misha over at Aces (the comments thingy is down again) but I can’t post them ’cause …well…the comments thingy is down. Heh. Curses. Foiled again.

A Miata in snow. I laughed just thinking about that. We got about a foot of Global Warming and I loved it. It justifies the money I spend driving a thirteen mpg 4×4 the rest of the year. Zoom.

I want a snow blower. Not that I need it, mind you. But I’d love the feeling of Control over the Elements that using one would impart.

We’ve been getting quite a bit of Global Warmening this year.

We got 4-6″ of that Global Warming here in St. Louis, too.

Musli – I used a big friggin’ snow blower once. POWER is precisely the feeling. I loved it.

Hint: I used a Dingo earth-mover thingy (you can rent ’em) once, too. I’ve had way worse sex.

I bet bucket-scoop crane operators Cat-9 drivers have all-day wood.

Do snow blowers cut through ice also?

I knew a guy who drove a front-end loader for a quarry. Made crazy good money, got half the year off for weather. Thing had air conditioning and a cassette player. It was sweet.

He got all pissed off, though, because the guys would shit in his scoop after lunch.

If you don’t like Huckabee because he’s an evangelical you simply must take a closer look at what Mormons teach.

You also have to scrutinize Romney’s record as governor as closely as Huckabee’s record.

I’m with McGoo. I like Fred.

And now I am off to buy supplies to make Christmas treats for a cookie exchange at my work.
Talk amongst yourselves.

The one I used didn’t, Muslihoon. But this was decades ago. I bet they’ve improved.

Pretty rude of folks to poo in a man’s tool box – so to speak. What if your cow orkers crapped in your PC? How would you feel? But – when ya gotta take a dump, ya gotta…

The thing I don’t like about Huckabee and the religion thing is not that I dislike him because I disagree with Evangelical Christianity–indeed, I quite admire Evangelical Christianity–but that Huckabee is trying to win support from Evangelicals because he’s Evangelical. I’m a Latter-day Saint and I don’t support Romney. I know of a few Latter-day Saints who do support Romney because he’s a brother (that is, in a Christian sense and not an African-American sense) but I also know plenty of Latter-day Saints–Sobek, skinbad, and dicentra to name three–who don’t support Romney despite the three being Latter-day Saints.

Romney seems to suggest that he will not impose his religious beliefs on the Republic if he’s elected president whereas the impression I get from what’s said about Huckabee is that he will allow Evangelical considerations to color his decisions.

Besides, when all is said and done, there is plenty to dislike about Huckabee’s policies and acts setting the religion question aside. Maybe this is why he’s appealing to an element to win support, an element that would override good sense.

That said, I know of plenty of Evangelicals who would not support Huckabee. Consider this: the arch-conservative Bob Jones III endorsed Romney over Huckabee. He endorsed Romney saying he completely disagrees with Romney’s beliefs and that he believes Romney, like all Latter-day Saints, is not a Christian. Yet he supports Romney’s political views. He passed over Huckabee, with whose beliefs Jones undoubtedly would have agreed. So, really, religious affiliation should not mean anything.

I’ll try to follow this thread from home, but I may not be able to. In case I cannot respond to someone objecting to what I wrote, I apologize in advance if what I said has offended anyone.

Dawn, I think Mormonism is one of the most fucked-up quasi-religious cults ever. I can’t believe any rational person could believe that messed up shit.

Paradoxically, I think rank-and-file Mormons tend to the squeaky clean, and that applies to Romney. And I know his record. He was a neighbor.

He’s not my ideal candidate, but he’s my slight favorite. He was my favorite by far at the beginning, but I’m unimpressed with his performance so far.

Meh. Three hundred million people, and this handful of bozos is the best we can do. P’tui!

I am not religious – at all. Never have been. Doubt I ever will be. Not quite sure I even approve of it, but so long as its live-and-let-live, I’ll put up with it. I don’t give a dry, crumpled crap what anyone else believes so long as they leave me alone. I think that’s more than fair.

That given, my objection to almost all (R) candidates except for Fred! is that they are – to an extent – wearing their religion/beliefs on their sleeve. Jimmy carter did this. W does too, to a significantly lesser degree. I don’t trust people who wear their beliefs on the sleeve. It says to me that their religion is part of their conscious, active, daily agenda. That makes my nose perk up for the scent of fanaticism.

I don’t want a President that – when we are attacked – automatically “turns the other cheek”.

I want a President that consider that option, along with every other option, but is NOT constrained by his personal religious beliefs from acting – or refraining from acting – in a particular manner. He’s in the Oval Office – not a fucking church pew.

Oh. Final point. I think the coming election is one of the most important elections in the history of the nation and – equally – the world.

I don’t mean that as Yankee Arrogance. Our country’s actions affect, reverberate, and reinforce and aggravate the actions of other countries – like it or not.

I think that’s why I am – quietly – pretty stressed about it. There are soooo many ways this situation could go to shit.

Heh. Musli writes a well thought out, logical, fairly innocuous comment about religion and politics and is worried about giving offense.

Just a quick scan of this thread alone and I see:
veterinary pharmaceutical abuse, Mormon bashing, strap on dildos, shitting in a front loader’s bucket, compare/contrasts of Jeri Thompson and ladies of the evening, body cavity searches, and spork injuries.

I wouldn’t sweat it, Muslihoon.

Pup – I love it.

What Pupster said.

Big fucking rat found. Five times bigger than other rats. Kentucky Fried Chicken stock soars in late trading.

Ace had it. I cut out the middleman ’cause he gets plenty of links:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/12/17/giant.rat.ap/index.html

Why am I suddenly remembering a Dirty Johnny joke?

Say it!

I am an evangelical and I have never thought it was the government’s responsiblility to “turn the other cheek”. In fact, I believe it is government’s responsibility to pursue justice. George Washington wore his faith on his sleeve and we were freed from the oppression of the crown and America was born as a result.
That being said many of my poliitcal leanings come directly from my faith. The Sanctity of Human Life from conception to natural death, the belief that it is the church’s responsibility to care for widows and orphans (not the government) and my support of the nation of Israel, to name a few. I feel that if something is powerful enough to make you a believer it should affect your every day person.

That’s certainly some rat, McGoo.

Actually, I quite like rats…

Plough? Plough!?

Oh, Stoaty. We’ve lost you, haven’t we? You’ve gone completely over to the Dark Side of the Atlantic.

I really struggled with that, ‘Brain. I couldn’t remember whether “plough” were British or just old-fashioned. I do the same thing with draftsman/draughtsman. I go back and forth pretty promiscuously.

You can’t blame Uncle B for that, though. Blame Charles Dickens.

I knew it! Evil, thy name is Dickens.

In my opinion, the most insane stupidity ever inflicted upon the English language is the “gh” combination.

I’m pretty sure it was introduced by Charles Dickens.

Fred Thompson was one of my Dad’s heart surgeons while he was getting his heart transplant. 19 years later, and Dad’s still one healthy old cuss. If nothing else, Fred Thompson is one helluva surgeon.

Dunno what kind of politician he is, but he seems to have done our state a fair lot more good than that prick Al Gore has.

Wait a minute… after a quick trip to Google, I’ve seen I’ve made a foe paw (lol… weasel pun) here. It wasn’t Fred Thompson who operated on Dad. It was Bill Frist. Bah. And here I thought I’d add something relevant. That’ll learn me for talking politics with the big folks. I’ll go back to the young’uns table now then. -_-

Good lord. If this is the grownupses table, I took a wrong turn at Albuquerque.

Fred Thompson was supervising Bill Frist.

Fred Thompson was probably watching a few episodes of Scrubs while Frist was transplanting a heart. xD

Mom! Shuko’s making faces at me!

Plof? Drot? The Mustelidae fambly sure talks funny.

I do the same thing with draftsman/draughtsman. I go back and forth pretty promiscuously.

Lokki thinks: …. Must resist temptation….Must!
Lokki is finally going to get to the grownupes table… don’t blow it

(Damn! Lokki makes a poor choice of phrasing AGAIN)

Talk Politics! That’s the Ticket! They’ll fixate on that!:

The whole “Wonder Fred” thing escapes me. I never watched him on TV, so I have no prefabricated mental image of him as a wise and cynical old Judge or Attorney or whatever he played. When I look at his record, I see a so-so Congress Critter Actor who seems compromisible on his stands, rather than the “Rock of Conservatism” that everyone else seems to see.

Huck mystifies me even more. This guy is supposed to be a ?REPUBLICAN?. He’s no more Republican than Little Abner, and perhaps not as bright. My response to his surge can generally be summed up in a single statement:

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THE REPUBLICANS IN IOWA?.

I really have no problem with Mitt Romney,although he reminds me of Bush Sr., in that he’s an administrator and not a leader.

I don’t mind Rudy either. Rudy is a NYC wheeler-dealer with a bit of tough-guy prosecutor thrown in. He ain’t perfect, but he may be electable if the pouty kids can get past his string of little scandals…

Is there anyone else to consider? Oh, McCain. Too bad he’s senile. None of my Republican friends trusts him, and interestingly none of my Democrat friends trusts him either. You never know which way he’s going to swing.

If you have ploughed plowed though all this we’ve come full circle.

George Bush (not W) said hello to me when I was 12 years old. I was getting coffee for a caucus and I ran into him in a hallway. My parents were Texas state delegates and I worked as a page during the convention. Does that rank up there with heart surgery and lawn mowing?

Yes, Lokki, I have to say…you’ve just described my feelings on the lineup pretty accurately.

Fred Thompson spells “plow” however the hell he wants.

Fred Thompson can perform heart surgery without anesthesia, if by ‘surgery’ you mean ‘bare-handed show it to you still beating removal’.

Fred Thompson shits in a front loader’s bucket on purpose, since there is no septic system on earth that can handle a Fred Thompson power dump. The heavy equipment operators fight each other for the honor.

Fred Thompson was not offended by Mulihoon’s comment. Those who have offended Fred Thompson are retroactively aborted by the time traveling T-1000 Fred Thompson. Fred would do it himself, but wants to appear to be pro-life.

The most recent astronomical data indicates that – contrary to popular scientific consensus – there was no “Big Bang” billions of years ago.

It was actually a “Big Fred”.

..and Fred gets two scoops of raisins in any fucking cereal he wants. Automatically.

Finally! Other people who loved those SNL sketches! I thought I was the only one!

Fred is the only man to actually have had sex with Hillary.

Wow, jw! – Here in the UK, that’d be libellous.

Fred could sue.

Lol. Fred Thompson is apparently the mild-mannered alter-ego of Chuck Norris. :p

Why? Oh! I know. He wanted to experience Utter Hell and Damnation himself, since he’s sent so many others there.

His only remark afterwards was, “Gritty.”

LOL! You all are awesome.

“Comment from Muslihoon
Time: December 17, 2007, 7:36 pm

Do snow blowers cut through ice also? ”

Not as a general rule. I think they’re designed to blow snow. On the other hand, chain saws work wonders on ice. In fact, that’s what many people use for the coarse shaping of ice sculptures. Now, once the chain saw has done its job, the snow blower may come in handy, but you may be able to use a wet-vac, too.

Yeah, yeah, I have funny hours and post at weird times when I have something to add. Sue me.

Snow and ice probs in the drive toots? Forget shovels.

C4

You know you want to.