See your Romnesia, raise you Barackoli
Eat your Barackoli, America!
Nah, just goofing. Stupid idea. And you know what? I didn’t even get there first.
Let me know how the last debate goes. I’ll be tucked up in my little weaselly bed, snoring and farting.
October 22, 2012 — 10:11 pm
Comments: 26
Binder full of weasel
Wow. That binder kerfuffle. That’s just all different kinds of stupid, huh?
By the way, go to do a Google search of “binder” and “binder full of women” is already the first suggestion.
October 17, 2012 — 8:48 pm
Comments: 18
Give ’em hell, Paul
Heh. I probably shouldn’t have gone with this. I don’t actually expect Ryan to slaughter Biden. Joe is, no kidding, a pretty decent debater. When he pays attention and keeps his shit together, he can pull off a damn good genial and statesman-like imposture.
And Ryan could come off as an abrasive smartass. Worst case, it might look like cocky puppy versus wise silver fox.
Well. Let’s hope for better. It’ll be in the wee hours my time, so I won’t know until morning. (Ah, I see Ace is managing expectations).
Remember — here. Tomorrow. Six of the clock Weasel Blog Time.
Dead Pool Round 39!!!
October 11, 2012 — 9:55 pm
Comments: 19
I haven’t quite got it
Trying to nail down The Smirk. You know, if I’m not careful, JUST when I finally nail down my Obama caricature, I’m not going to need it any more.
WOOOHOOO!
October 4, 2012 — 10:00 pm
Comments: 16
Wherein Weasel admits defeat
Nope. Sorry. Over my head. Out of my league. There is absolutely nothing I can do to this photo to make it creepier than the original. I’m sorry, people who are Photoshopping this image — you are living a lie.
That there’s Jim Messina, campaign manager for Obama 2012 and world creepiest ginger. The idea belonged to deputy campaign manager Stephanie Cutter, though. I guess you were supposed to write something on your flesh that you like about the Obama administration, take a picture and post it to the Twitter hashtag #forall.
That’s the kind of quirky, madcap kampaign kut-up that might have appealed to The Youth in 2008. No doubt that’s why these dweebs keep trying to float stuff like that.
But the 2008 campaign was like the Blair Witch Project — interesting idea, only works once. You can’t run a “what the hell, let’s give the new guy a try” campaign second time around.
Four years down the line, and it’s just sad. There you are, standing in front of a mirror with junk scribbled on your flesh in magic marker, looking every inch the kiddie-diddler.
September 19, 2012 — 10:52 pm
Comments: 32
ZOMG!
In case you missed it somehow, I’m riffing on the Newsweek “Muslim Rage” cover, which annoyed some and amused some and disgusted others. Yes, that is speck of spittle in his beard. No, I did not P’shop it in (but, as per usual, if anyone wants the raw color Photoshop file to make your own high-larious captions, drop me an email).
And before you get too complacent, First Worldies, I’m totally not kidding — the McRib has been rolled back to December. It was scheduled to go out in October.
ULULULULU!!!!
September 17, 2012 — 10:18 pm
Comments: 31
I made you a chair that is empty
Happy Empty Chair Day! Today’s the day our tribe displays empty chairs prominently.
And because I assume my readers are all lazy sacks of shit like me, I made you a Photoshop Empty Chair Day kit! You can make fun of Dear Leader without leaving the snug four walls of mom’s basement!
You can choose from a folding chair or a lovely wooden chair, if you prefer. They’re .png files, so they’re openable by lots of graphics programs (not just Photoshop, which you probably can’t afford in Obama’s America), but the .png format allows me to give you a transparent background.
That’s right — I did all the cutting around the little irritating bits for you!
Oops, gotta run. Have fun!
September 3, 2012 — 1:10 pm
Comments: 19
Winning!
D’awwwww…okay, yes. It’s adorable. But still — couldn’t he let the little girl win?
Have a good weekend, everyone! Go outside. Sit in the sun. Hurry. I heard Autumn sneaking up on us out there today.
August 31, 2012 — 7:59 pm
Comments: 27
He WOULD be a Picard guy.
That’s right. President Desperateguy McFlopsweat is doing a Reddit town hall thingie tonight. You can view it here.
If anybody wants my working copy of the pic — color, broken into Photoshop layers, ready for your recaptioning genius — drop me a line. I’d post it, but WordPress gets all pissy when you try to upload a .psd file.
August 29, 2012 — 10:16 pm
Comments: 16
Humility
Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. But for the sake of posterity (he’s an ignorant bastard, posterity), Barack Obama today observed the death of Neil Armstrong, first human on the moon, by running a picture of…himself — Obama — President Momjeans — staring at the moon. Plus, the pic is four months old.
Oh, I don’t for a moment think he personally approves the junk that goes on his Tumblr page. But sometimes, optics are everything…and this one, coming from the Narcissist in Chief, is a beaut.
August 27, 2012 — 10:21 pm
Comments: 22