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Gots to start somewhere…

wienershirt

Ordinarily, my MO would be to spend a week or two twiddling around with the graphics and layout and stuff, but I can’t resist jumping on the dogpile and taking craven advantage of Dear Leader’s latest humiliation….ummm…triumph…ahhhh….well-deserved award. So, here’s my test storefront and this links directly to my first shirt idea.

DON’T buy something to do me a favor, you wonderful bastards. I’ve turned the commission way, way down — as far as it’ll go — while I work out the kinks. I’d get pennies. I’m not doing this one for me, I’m doing it for Dear Leader.

DO, please…if you get a chance…go over and poke the buttons and pull the levers and let me know what you think of Zazzle and the interface and the range of products they’ve got. It’s all very rough at the moment, but that’s okay — the store template has customizable CSS, so I can really screw it up if I put my mind to it.

Oh, and my shirt idea. If you have suggestions, I can make changes. I want to get it right. It’s not every day that Obama gets accolades just for teh Awesome.

Oh, wait…yes it is!

sock it to me

Comments


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 3:40 pm

Dammit…just realized I didn’t sneak my URL onto the design. Entrepreneurial sooper genius, me.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: October 11, 2009, 4:33 pm

Dunno if it’s a zazzle glitch, but the titles that pop up when you hover over the product folders ar urlencoded, eg: “Dear%20Leader” instead of “Dear Leader”,

BTW: Love the color version of “…and the wiener is…”

 


Comment from Janna
Time: October 11, 2009, 4:38 pm

Weird to see the Weasel in color.

Can I haz a “Oh the HUGE vanity” T-Shirt please?

Can you sell them direct so’s to make oodles of sweet, sweet moolah? Ya know, “Ha Ha Ha Mine, all Mine” and don’t share nuthin wif nobody.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: October 11, 2009, 4:40 pm

‘Umble suggestion: I’ve always wanted a tee-shirt that says in big letters “Some Assembly Required”

Those among us not as close to 50 as we used to be will understand.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 4:49 pm

I can try, Janna. But the Hindenburg photos I can find are very low resolution and the originals are old enough to be out of copyright, but might be protected as part of a photo collection. I’m intensely paranoid about copyright, having done this sort of work for a corporation for years and years.

And if you do it yourself, you have upfront printing costs…plus warehousing, sizing, leftover stock, shipping and handling. It becomes frighteningly like a day job. It’s one thing if you had the rights to something huge like South Park’s merchandizing. It’s another if you’re selling Obama’s face on a wiener.

Yeah, I’m finding Zazzle’s issues, jw. Like, knocking out the whites when you superimpose the design on a dark T. That’s why I wanted to get something out there without doing my usual anal-retentive thing with the storefront first.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 4:50 pm

Oh…and if it’s just a type treatment, jw, you can design your own for nothing. They’ll do a one-off custom T for you.

 


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:10 pm

The storefront is cool. You should add a weasel to your profile photo thingy. Good luck

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:12 pm

Yeah, Weez, I discovered that, and played around with it. Didn’t like what I ended up with, but I may have another go at it another day. Today, I do nothing*.

* eating, drinking, snoozing excepted

BTW: What kind of English is “Describes themself as”?

Also BTW: the link on your profile page reads “sweasel.com” but goes to your main Zazzle page.

 


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:18 pm

Seggestion for another shirt; put a tv with the fox news logo in front of your cry-baby Obama. The WH called fox news the propaganda wing of the GOP (or some such horse shit) today. He can’t stop crying about fox news…

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:20 pm

I have added a weasel to the profile page, Buck. One thing I’ve discovered — changes to the store front take a long time to propagate. The “describes themself as” made me wince, too, jw. I still stubbornly insist on using “him” and “her” and the rise of “them” as a singular pronoun makes me NUTS.

It was cold and raw here today. We had a big fire in the new woodstove, and bacon sammiches and tea and piled up on the couch and watched Battle of Britain.

…and if we don’t get out of this goddamned house tomorrow, the top of Uncle B’s head will blow off.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:47 pm

Yeah. That, and Stephen King using “which” to introduce restrictive clauses keeps my blood pressure in the higher ranges.

 


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: October 11, 2009, 5:50 pm

Cool

 


Comment from Chef Mojo
Time: October 11, 2009, 6:02 pm

Very cool! Can’t wait to see how this pans out.

Zombie Reagan, please, PLEASE, pretty please!

 


Comment from harbqll
Time: October 11, 2009, 6:05 pm

Love it, Weas. Awesome start. Keep up da good woik. I cannot wait to start wearing your stuff around campus. My Commie-libtard profs are going to frickin melt down.

I wish I knew where he lived; I’d send one of these to McGoo. Maybe that will bring him back around?

I’d add your url somewhere on the edge of the shirt graphic, though.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 6:11 pm

Reagan, for sure, Chef. But the poor bastard needs some work. At 300 dpi, he’d print out the size of a postage stamp.

Oh, harbqll — don’t be silly! McGoo is always with us. He’s the wind in the trees, and the scent of flowers on the air, and…the pr0n. Definitely the pr0n.

Are you telling me you’re a STUDENT?! Jesus.

 


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: October 11, 2009, 6:25 pm

Oh, and MO hugging the Queen. I love that one.

 


Comment from harbqll
Time: October 11, 2009, 6:55 pm

I’m what you call a “non-traditional” student. I became temporarily insane a few years ago, and decided to quit my job and go to medical school. Most of my classmates are young enough to be my children…if I had started having children in my mid-teens. I’ll be just shy of my 42nd birthday when they hand me the Ultimate Cosmic Power of Life and Death.

(And then slap the slave chains on me, and ship me off to a government health care labor camp, where I can hopefully make enough money to keep myself in bologna sandwiches.)

I want pancake-head-islamic-rage-boy on a coffee mug. One of those giant 32-oz travel mugs.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 11, 2009, 7:03 pm

Ha! I thought about med school in my late twenties. My stepmother nearly swallowed her tongue when I brought it up.

I don’t think I’d have made it through, though. I’m missing the right stuff.

 


Comment from weirdsister
Time: October 11, 2009, 8:15 pm

Stoaty, the shirt is AWESOME. But I’m not going to buy it until you are getting more than just pennies for it. Let us know when you’ve upped the commission.

 


Comment from Pupster
Time: October 11, 2009, 9:13 pm

Weasel,
You should develop your brand. The political stuff is good for us 48%ers, but seriously…who wouldn’t want that adorable little Winking Weasel on a spiffy little oxford? WEASEL WEAR! Hats, scarves, snuggies, underwear, socks, beer cozys, coasters, roach clips, lingerie, office furniture. You’ll be bigger than Izod. Eddie Bauer can kiss your furry ass!

 


Comment from Red State Witch
Time: October 11, 2009, 10:06 pm

jwpaine – Ah, another grammar aficionado. We used to joke in law school that you could tell the students who were on law review; we were the ones arguing over whether a period could be italicized.

Stoaty, weirdsister (my lovely wife, no less!) is right. Remember the words of Navin Johnson: “Ahh, it’s a PROFIT deal!” Make teh product; we buys teh product; you makes teh money. Tens of dollars, at least.

 


Comment from David Gillies
Time: October 11, 2009, 11:08 pm

Yeah, seconded on the commission thing. And as I’ve said before, I wants me a Zombie Reagan shirt, and I means to have me one.

 


Comment from MPFS recipient of Nobel Fish Sticks
Time: October 11, 2009, 11:53 pm

I love the “Guards Release the Weasel.” Me want.

 


Comment from Pupster
Time: October 12, 2009, 9:59 am

Seriously though…just the Weasel stuff would fly off the virtual shelves, and no copyright issues.

The moronosphere news network monkey would make a nifty bumper sticker.

 


Comment from cube
Time: October 12, 2009, 10:48 am

I’ve heard many people comment about Zombie Reagan. Is there some link you can provide for the noobies in the crowd so we see it?

 


Comment from jw
Time: October 12, 2009, 11:13 am

Weasel, WE da Weasel minions WISH for you to make some good moola on this venture. Up your commission like a good Capitalist Weasel. Build it and they will come!

 


Comment from surly ermine
Time: October 12, 2009, 12:23 pm

Ooooo, that’s a bad-ass weasel on the store header. Me wants that on a shirt! I’m preordering!

 


Comment from Pupster
Time: October 12, 2009, 12:24 pm

Left sidebar cube, under the highly marketable ‘American Weasel in darkest England’ graphic.

 


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: October 12, 2009, 12:26 pm

Cube – upper left of the home page, “Home of Zombie Reagan”

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: October 12, 2009, 12:31 pm

Yes – I am seldom heard here, but always present, harqbll.

…And I would kill for a genuine S.Weasel pancake/IRB Tee-shirt or coffee mug. And a Zombie Reagan (color!) on a T, and the “Billy” Moronsphere thingy on a T, and the Cats’OPhone graphic, the Official S.Weasel Title Header as you showed over at Zazzle, and….and…oh, hell, your whole portfolio will do nicely, thank you!

Get this going before Christmas shopping starts, Weasel, and your fortune is made.

 


Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: October 12, 2009, 1:03 pm

Weasel,

When I see these artistic type things it makes me want to draw again. You and Surly make some of the coolest stuff.

Oh, and as far as Medical School, I’ve also thought about it(granted, I’m of normal university age). However, I too, in my wisdom, decided it wasn’t for me(I was always good at science but never great at it). Instead, it seems like I’ll be doing something related to finance(just like my father and grandfather). After all, that’s where the money is at(well, that and politics).

 


Comment from Alice H
Time: October 12, 2009, 1:12 pm

I third or fourth or fifth or whatever wanting Zombie Reagan. But I want a coffee mug.

 


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: October 12, 2009, 3:43 pm

Ooo! Don’t forget the “Drunken Weasel” graphic too! That used to crack me up everytime I saw it.

 


Comment from Malcolm Kirkpatrick
Time: October 12, 2009, 3:47 pm

I’ll take a zombie t-shirt and a Weasel Times mug. I already stole your Palin poster.

Since you’re in a position to know…what happeed to Rachel Lucas? She’s been quiet for a while.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 12, 2009, 4:16 pm

Hm. I dunno, Malcolm. We traded a few emails when she moved over here, but I’m embarrassed to say I never got around to blogrolling her (my blogroll is a bitch to edit) and I TOTALLY haven’t kept up on my blog reading in the last ten months.

I have looked in on her from time to time, though. A month is a long time without an update, isn’t it? She’s in the next county over…let me just get my flashlight…

 


Comment from cube
Time: October 12, 2009, 4:22 pm

Pupster & BackNutty: Thanks.

 


Comment from mongo
Time: October 12, 2009, 5:42 pm

I love the idea because your stuff is teh stuff. Y’now? But, my personal mongo request would be “Obammmah!” because I laughed so hard at that painting. I laugh just thinking of that painting. Yes, I’m laughing about it now. heh.

 


Comment from rick
Time: October 12, 2009, 8:18 pm

I looked at Ms Lucas’s about me stuff and she says she’s busy with school or some such nonsense.

I want your merch, Ms Weasel. Sure appreciate your touch and wit. Be proud to wear (or drink my coffee from) Weasel-decorated items.

Get ready, you’re about to get richer than the send-a-dollar-to-everyone-on-this-list chain letter guy (as seen on Oprah!!!).

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: October 12, 2009, 8:50 pm

I think that guy died alone and penniless in a filthy bedsit in Schenectady. Just saying.

 


Comment from cube
Time: October 12, 2009, 10:15 pm

No, it was a filthy bedsit in Poughkeepsie. Just saying.

 


Comment from Sordy
Time: October 13, 2009, 12:14 am

What’s a zombie Reagan? I am confused… Yea, I am not politicized at all! I am confused about one thing – what did President Obama do to get some award? Not into awards either. I just enjoy life such as it is – usually ugly and at best inconvenient. Never really liked President Reagan – kept telling me how wonderful I am – LOL – Not much else! Sounded too much like a vacuum cleaner salesman.
The President Clinton was at least slightly amusing. Whats the definition of sex? ROFL. I kinda miss those simple times…
Thinking of going south of the border again to live with the real conservatives. President, who is that or who cares! Got to appreciate it when a cop pulls you over and says “100 peso’s here or goto court next month in Chetumal and pay 300 peso’s” Seriously old school!!! I love it.

I am a strange one – Most of all… Have fun! Sordy

 


Comment from iamfelix
Time: October 13, 2009, 3:42 am

I think that guy died alone and penniless in a filthy bedsit in Schenectady. Just saying.

That was Stephen Foster – From Wiki:

He had been impoverished while living at the North American Hotel at 30 Bowery on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, New York. His brother Henry described the accident in the New York theater-district hotel that led to his death: confined to bed for days by a persistent fever, Foster tried to call a chambermaid, but collapsed, falling against the washbasin next to his bed and shattering it, which gouged his head. It took three hours to get him to Bellevue Hospital, and in an era before transfusions and antibiotics, he succumbed three days after his admittance at the age of thirty-seven.

In his worn leather wallet there was found a scrap of paper that simply said “Dear friends and gentle hearts.” He had thirty-seven cents at the time of his passing.

Foster was buried in the Allegheny Cemetery in Pittsburgh. One of his best loved works, “Beautiful Dreamer,” was published shortly after his death.

If you’re inclined, I highly recommend Ken Emerson’s 1998 book on Foster, Doo Dah! Stephen Foster and the Rise of American Popular Culture – fascinating and sad, and clearly a cautionary tale on life in Thee Artes.

 


Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: October 15, 2009, 11:56 am

Personally, I ain’t gonna purchase any mo’ clothing from anybody else until I get my “WANNA RASSLE?” shirt with the weasel mug onnit.

Help me out, ’cause winter is coming on.

 


Comment from J.S.Bridges
Time: October 18, 2009, 8:45 pm

FWIW, I think your next shirt idea should feature The-Won-as-wet-diaper-crybaby…

Possible appropriate text: “Can we HOPE for a CHANGE for the better soon?”

Or: “We’re not happy either – maybe we can get a CHANGE, too!”

Or some such –

 

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