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A tragic story of wild turkey love

wild turkeys

My office is located on large and beautiful grounds (who started calling these “campuses” and why can’t we legally murder him?) with much wildlife. Occasionally, some of that wildlife gets past the automatic doors and into the lobby. Mostly wild turkeys.

I got to work about 6:30 in the morning Friday and found a turkey in the foyer. There were feathers EVERYwhere and it was lying on its back but, I was surprised to see, not dead. It was panting and making odd sounds and waving its legs feebly in the air.

I talked to it for a while and considered trying to turn it over with my toe, but someone walked up behind me and advised me not to try. They’re mean peckers, I guess. Anyhow, we decided what had happened was, the thing got into the glass-in foyer, panicked, stuck its stupid head against the glass and ran in place until it fell over, exhausted. I’ve seen them try that maneuver, so it’s entirely possible.

That’s all I know about it, though. We called Building and Grounds and went on in to work. Nothing but a little fluff left when I came out for lunch. That’s not my story.

I was telling someone about the turkey, and she said she saw the oddest thing one morning not long ago. Down the long hill on the lawn, a turkey was slowly walking around and around in circles. Curious, she walked down the hill to get a closer look.

He was walking around and around a dead female turkey in the grass. She looked it up later, and the poor dumb bastards mate for life. So that was likely Mrs Poor Dumb Bastard.

Sad, no?

sock it to me

September 6, 2008 — 8:37 am
Comments: 77